Hemmingway Jokes / Recent Jokes

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer. --Frank Zappa

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. --Ernest Hemmingway

Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. --Winston Churchill

He was a wise man who invented beer. --Plato

Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time. --Catherine Zandonella

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the --decency to thank her. W.C. Fields

Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink. --Lady Astor to Winston Churchill

Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it. --His reply

If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have --given us stomachs. David Daye

Work is the curse of the drinking class. more...

Ernest Hemmingway once said that the only true sports out there are bloodsports: boxing, bullfighting, mountain climbing. Anything else, he said, was just a game.
How much d'you wanna bet Ernest Hemmingway had a really small dick?

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline; it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.

Frank Zappa
Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. Ernest Hemmingway
Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.

Winston Churchill
He was a wise man who invented beer. Plato
Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time. Catherine

Zandonella
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

W. C. Fields
Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink.

Lady Astor to Winston Churchill
Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it. His reply
If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs.

David Daye
Work is the curse of the drinking class. Oscar more...