Hick Jokes / Recent Jokes

Bubba's old lady had been pregnant for some time, and now the time had come. He brought her to the doctor, and the doctor began to deliver the baby. She had a little boy, and the doctor looked over at Bubba and said, "Hey, Bubba! You just had you a son!"

Bubba got excited by this, but just then the doctor spoke up and said, "Hold on, son! We ain't finished yet!" The doctor then delivered a little girl. He said, "Hey, Bubba! Hey, you got you a daughter!"

Bubba got kind of puzzled by this, and then the doctor says, "Hold on, we still ain't finished!" The doctor then delivered another boy and said, "Bubba, you just had another boy! But don't worry,' cause that's it!"

So, Bubba and his wife went home with the three children. When they got home, they sat down and began talking. Bubba said, "Mama, you remember that night that we ran out of K-Y and we had to use that 3-in-1 Oil?"

She said, more...

Pappy sees Elmer walking with a lantern and asks, "Where ya a-going boy? "

The son smiled and replied, "I'm a-going courting sweet lil' Miss Peggy-Sue."

The Father said, "When I went a-courtin', I didn't need me no dang lantern."

"Sure Pa, I know." the boy said. "And look what you got! "

Two rednecks decided that they weren't going anywhere in life and thought they should go to college to get ahead. The first redneck went to see a professor who told him to take math, history, and logic.

"What's logic?" asked the first redneck.

The professor answered, "Let me give you an example. Do you own a Weedeater?"

"I sure do," answered the redneck.

"Then, I can assume, using logic, that you have a yard," replied the professor.

"That's real good," the redneck responded in awe.

The professor continued, "Logic will also tell me that since you have a yard, you also have a house."

Impressed, the redneck shouted, "Amazin!"

"And since you own a house, logic dictates that you have a wife."

"Betty Mae! This is incredible!"

"Finally, since you have a wife, logically I can assume that you more...

A wise old farmer went to town to buy a new pickup truck that he saw advertised in the paper for a certain price.

After telling the salesman which truck he wanted, they set down to do the paperwork.

The salesman handed the farmer the bill, and the farmer declared This isn't the price I saw!".

The salesman went on to tell the old wise farmer how he was getting extras such as power steering, power brakes, power windows, special tires, etc. and that was what took the price up.

The farmer, needing the truck badly, paid the price and went home.

A few months later, the salesman called up the farmer and said, "My son is in 4-H and he needs a cow for a project. Do you have any for sale?"

The farmer replied, "Yes, I have a few cows I would sell for $500 apiece, Come and look at them and take your pick".

The salesman said he and his son would be right out.

After spending a few hours more...

Billy is a poor boy, lives on a farm, gets made fun of at school, and does'nt have any friends. So he's walking home one day from school, and at that it was'nt a very good one, and as he's almost at his house, see's a pig, and says, "Stupid fuck'in pig." and kicks it.

Then his mom sticks her head out the window and says,"Billy, I saw that. No pork for a month!".

Billy says,"Bitch!." see's the chicken walking around and says,"Stupid fuck'in chikcen, strut'in around like she owns the place!"and kicks it.

The mom stcks her head out the window, and says,"Billy,I saw that. No chicken for... 2 months!".

Then Billy goes and sits down on his porch because he figures if he goes inside he'll just get in more trouble. About five minutes later,his dad pulls up in thier pick-up truck, opens up the door, and steps on their cat. The dad says,"Stupid fuck'in cat!"and kicks it.

Billy more...

A Kansas farmer got in his pickup and drove to a neighboring farm and knocked at the door. A young boy, about 9, opened the door.

"Is yer Dad home?" the farmer asked.

"No sir, he ain't," the boy replied. "He went into town."

"Well," said the farmer, "Is yer Mother here?"

"No, sir, she ain't here neither. She went into town with Dad."

"How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?"

"No sir, He went with Mom and Dad."

The farmer stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other and mumbling to himself.

"Is there anything I can do fer ya?" the boy asked politely "I know where all the tools are, if you want to borry one. Or maybe I could take a message fer Dad."

"Well," said the farmer uncomfortably, "I really wanted to talk to yer Dad. It"s about your more...

English..... I Love You
Spanish..... Te Amo
French...... Je T'aime
German...... Ich Liebe Dich
Japanese.... Ai Shite Imasu
Italian..... Ti Amo
Chinese..... Wo Ai Ni
Swedish..... Jag Alskar Dig
Eskimo...... Nagligivaget
Greek....... S'Agapo
Hawaiian.... Aloha Wau la Oe
Irish....... Thaim In Grabh Leat
Hebrew...... Ani Ohev Otakh
Russian..... Ya Lyublyu Tyebya
Albanian.... Une Te Dua
Finnish..... Mina Rakkastan Sinua
Turkish..... Seni Seviyorum
Hungarian... Se Ret Lay
Persian..... Du Stet Daram
Maltese..... ien Inhobbok
Catalan..... Testimo Molt

Redneck..... Nice Tits