Hill Jokes / Recent Jokes
Little Johnny was always late for school. Day after day he would come to class late. Lastly his teacher told him if he was late one more day he would be suspended.
So, the next morning he showed up to class late and the teacher asked him why he was late.
He replied, "I was riding my bike down the hill next to the school, and my brakes gave out. At the bottom of the hill there was a goat, and my handle bar went right up his ass."
"RECTUM!" corrected the teacher. With that little Johnny repiled, "Wrecked him? Hell, it killed him!"
There once was this group of strange beings called Trids. The Trids were only about a foot long, and the lived in a valley next to a hill. Every day they would climb the hill to gather berries and other plant foods.
At the top of the hill lived an Ogre that always kicked the Trids down the hill.
Finally, the leader of the Trids called a local Rabbi to come help them get food and to talk to the ogre. The Rabbi stood behind a tree on the hill and watched the Trids climb up the hill.
All was fine, until the Ogre popped out of a cave and one-by-one kicked the screaming Trids down the hill.
The Rabbi scaled the hill and asked the hideous creature why he kept kicking the Trids.
The Ogre looked over at the Rabbi and simply replied, ''Silly Rabbi, Kicks are for Trids.'' '
The Lone Ranger and Tonto are riding through one of the many canyons, when suddenly rising from the hill on their right are hundreds of Indians. They start to spur their horse forward, when they realized that there are hundreds of Indians ahead of them. Wheeling to the left they, once again, see hundreds of Indians rising from the hill. They begin to back away in the direction from which they had come and they realize they were surrounded.
The Indians had spread out and they were trapped. The Lone Ranger turns to Tonto, his life long friend, and says,' Tonto, my friend, I think I must say that I have treasured our times together, but now I think we are doomed.'
'We?' replied Tonto.' What's all this' we' crap, Paleface?'
There was this bartender working one shift then this guy comes in Naked and the tender says where did you come from? the guy says Blueberry Hill! Next another naked guy comes in and again the tender says where did you come from? the guy says Blueberry Hill! Next another naked guy comes in then, where did you come from? the guy says Blueberry Hill! Then a naked women comes in and the guy says wait let me guess you just got off blueberry hill? then she says how could i get off blueberry hill if i am blueberry hill???
Then the tender says Can I go to BLueberry Hill? THen she replys Let me first open the entrance gate while you get the car ready??
A man was walking through the Sahara desert, desperate for water, when he saw something, far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he walked towards the image, only to find a little old man sitting at a card table with a bunch of neckties laid out on it.
The man asked, "Please, I'm dying of thirst, can I have some water?"
The little old man replied "I don't have any water, but why don't you buy a tie? Here's one that goes nicely with your shirt."
The man shouted, "I don't want a tie, you idiot, I need water!"
"OK, don't buy a tie. But to show you what a nice guy I am, I'll tell you that over that hill there, about four miles, is a nice restaurant. Walk that way, they'll give you all the water you want."
The man thanked him and walked away towards the hill and eventually disappeared from view. Three hours later the man came crawling back to where the little old man was sitting behind his card table. He said, "I told more...
Bubba came visitin' up north, and decided he wanted to go and do something he could never do in South Alabama...
. .... SNOW SKIING. .....
Unfortunately, before he ever made it UP the hill so's he could *try* and come DOWN the hill on ski's, he was knocked unconscious by the chairlift.
He called his insurance company from the hospital, but they said they were refusing to cover the injury.
"WHAT?!?" yelled Bubba at the phone. "And just why wouldn't you cover an injury like this?" he complained.
"You got hit in the head by a chairlift," Bubba's insurance rep said. "That makes you a moron... and we consider that to be a pre-existing condition."
A professer was teaching class when this male student walks in late. The teacher says "Where were you?" the student answers on Blueberry Hill. A second male student walks in and the professer says "Where were you?" The student says Bluebberry Hill. and the third male student walks in and the professer asks the same thing and he says Blueberry Hill.A female student walks in late and the proffesser said "let me guess you were on Blue Berry Hill." she said no I am Blue Berry Hill!!!"