Hindi Jokes / Recent Jokes

One day laloo appeared on kbc(kaun banega crorepathy) with him he brought his entire family.
First question: one one?
Laloo thinking: uses all lifelines and answers three
Amitji: sorry laloo wrong jawaab
Groans from laloo`s family: give him one more chance give him one more chance
Amitji feeling sorry for distraught laloo, decides to give him another go
So he asks laloo: three two?
Lalloo answers: six
Amitji cannot believe it, but because laloo`s family begs for him to give laloo another chance, he does
Amitji: laloo last chance, three three?
Lalloo sweating answers six
Amitji is silent, suddenly there is a roar from laloo`s family: give him one more chance, give him one more chance…

Bill Clinton decided to teach' Laloo English, so he invited him over to the US. Laloo arrives
in full grandeur. Bill announces to the nation that they should not be disturbed during the
tution inside the White house, they are locked up in a room, and Bill starts teaching Laloo
English. Days pass by and weeks pass by, but there is no sign of them coming out.
The whole country and its economy has come to a standstill, and press, news reporters from all
over the world are waiting outside eagerly to find the outcome. At last one day, the door opens,
and out comes Laloo -beaming his resplendant white smile, looking cool and unruffled. However,
Bill looks totally dazed, his clothes are torn, his hair is completely ruffled, and he has
scratch marks all over his face.

Theshocked reporters ask Bill, "What happened Mr. Clinton? "
Bill replies: "Ee babua hamar kuch bhi naahi sunat hai! "

HERE is a variation of the one-legged tandoori chicken anecdote. A dhabawala who had been questioned for serving such a bird took his customer outside and showed him a hen which happened at the time to be standing on one leg. The customer cried "shoo, shoo". The hen promptly scampered away on its two legs. Unabshed the dhabawala replied, "Sir, if only you had shouted' shoo shoo' before eating my chicken, the second leg would have appeared."

In a remote village of India, once Masterji is teaching the Mahabharat katha to class 6 students. He is at the ‘Krishna janma’ part of it.
Masterji: “Kansa heard the akashwani that his sister’s 8th child is going to kill him. He was furious. He ordered to put Vasudev and Devki behind the bars. First son is born, and kansa kills him by poisoning… Second one is born n Kansa throws him off the mountain peak. Third one is born…
Ramu: I have a doubt (sounding nervous and confused).
Masterji: “Ramu bete, whole India does not have doubt in Mahabharata then how come you have one? ”
Ramu: Masterji, if Kansa knew that Devaki’s 8th child was going to Kill him, “Why the hell did he put Vasudev and Devaki in the same cell? ”
Masterji fainted.

MY friend Onkar Singh who returned from Ahmedabad last week posed a question which I could not answer. "How is it that in Gujarat where every man is a bhai and every woman a ben and population keeps on increasing?
J. P. Singh Kaka has drawn my attention to the same kind of confusion that exists in the minds of some people. A bachelor on the look-out for a wife was advised by a friend to put in an ad in the matrimonial columns. He took the advice. A few weeks later his friends asked him if he had any luck. "Yes," replied the bachelor and added naively, "kaee bahnon kay to khat bhee aaye hain-many sisters have written to me."

Top Ten list. .. If Sonia Gandhi becomes the Prime Minister....
10. There will be branches of Olive Garden all over India
and they will be called OZinda Bagicha!!
9. Their only vegetarian dish will be Eggplant Parmesan and
it will be called Anda-Pauda Parmeshwaran!!
8. All Vadapav Gaadis and Stalls will be selling Pizza and
Pasta.
7. India's National Sport will be - Ofcourse Soccer.
6. Laloo will lose his position as the national animal and
will be replaced by Jayalalitha!
5. National vegetable-Zucchini
4. There will be Pope John Paul's' yearly' visit - twice
every year!!
3. Jahangir Art gallery will be renamed to "Michaelangelo's
Confetti house"!!
2. Men in Indian Army will wear Mini Skirts!!
And. .. the number one thing that will happen if Sonia
Becomes the Prime Minister of India is.....
1. All Sindhi People will get promotions in their positions
because she thinks they are all more...

Amithab: if you tell the correct answer of 15th question; you will become a crorepati.
Santa: oh! Then you ask the 15th question directly now.