Holocaust Jokes / Recent Jokes

Several businesses in England have banned the British flag for fear of violent Muslim reactions, after an extremist group leveled warnings that the flag's red cross reminds Muslims of the Crusades. This is slightly more insane than my refusal to use the microwave because ovens remind me of the Holocaust.
Meanwhile, the Baltimore County Muslim Council is demanding that public schools remove Jewish holidays from the school calendar unless they're ready to give days off for Muslim holy days as well. It's a predictable development, of course. Soon enough, Holocaust education at schools will change too, taking into account Muslim sensitivities. After all, Hitler may seem like a villain to little Shlomo, but little Qudsia may see things differently.

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff."
- singer Mariah Carey.
Question: "If you could live forever, would you and why?" Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever."
- Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss Universe contest.
"Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana... The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two, but can't remember what they are."
- Matt Lauer on NBC's Today show, August 22.
"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law."
- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering more...

Q: How many holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None, they just deny the bulb ever went out in the first place.

PLEASE ENGAGE BRAIN BEFORE SPEAKING
Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff.
- Mariah Carey
Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever.
- Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss Universe contest
Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana... The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two, but can't remember what they are.
- Matt Lauer on NBC's Today show, August 22
I haven't committed a crime.
What I did was fail to comply with the law.
- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay more...

An 88 year old man opened fire in Wahington DC Holocaust Museum.
John McCain said, "See... I told you old guys could do things."