Homosexual Jokes / Recent Jokes
A homosexual walked into a delicatessen and asked the shopkeeper for a large knob of salami." Would you like it sliced, sir?" the shopkeeper asked politely." What do you think I am?" replied the fag, "... a money box!"
Three desperately ill men met with their doctor one day to discuss their options. One was an alcoholic, one was a chain smoker, and one was a homosexual. The doctor, addressing all three of them, said, "If any of you indulge in your vices one more time, you will surely die." The men left the doctor`s office, each convinced that he would never again indulge himself in his vice. While walking toward the subway for their return trip to the suburbs, they passed a bar. The alcoholic, hearing the loud music and seeing the lights, could not stop himself. His buddies accompanied him into the bar, where he had a shot of whiskey. No sooner had he replaced the shot glass on the bar, he fell off his stool, stone cold dead. His companions, somewhat shaken, left the bar, realizing how seriously they must take the doctor`s words. As they walked along, they came upon a cigarette butt lying on the ground, still burning. The homosexual looked at the chain smoker and said, "If you bend more...
Pillow talk in Missouri: Has sex been outlawed?
KANSAS CITY, Mo. (AP) - Birds do it. Bees do it. But Missourians aren't allowed to do it, according to some interpretations of a new state law.
"I don't know what they were trying to say, but I know that what they did say seems to outlaw sex altogether," said David Foster, director of the writing lab a the University of Missouri-Kansas City.
Others disagree. One legislator says it legalizes homosexual sex and outlaws nonconsensual sex. Another says it outlaws homosexual sex and nonconsensual sex.
The law, which took effect Aug. 28, says: "A person commits the crime of sexual misconduct in the first degree if he has deviate sexual intercourse with another person of the same sex, or he purposely subjects another person to sexual contact or engages in conduct which would constitute sexual contact except that the touching occurs through the clothing without that person's consent."
Attorney Dan Viets more...
You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.
You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat, than U.S. nuclear weapons technology, in the hands of Chinese communists.
You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.
You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected by yuppies driving SUVs.
You have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being homosexual is natural.
You have to be against capital punishment but support abortion on demand.
You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.
You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists who've never been outside of more...
A homosexual walked into a delicatessen and asked the shopkeeper for a large knob of salami."Would you like it sliced, sir?" the shopkeeper asked politely."What do you think I am?" replied the fag, "...a money box!"
I know that many of you have heard Pat Robertson, Jerry Fallwell and others speak of the "Homosexual Agenda," but no one has ever seen a copy of it.
Well, I have finally obtained a copy directly from the Head Homosexual. It follows below:
6:00 am Gym
8:00 am Breakfast (oatmeal and egg whites)
9:00 am Hair appointment
10:00 am Shopping
12:00 PM Brunch
2:00 PM
Assume complete control of the U.S. Federal, State and Local Governments as well as all other national governments,
Recruit all straight youngsters to our debauched lifestyle,
Destroy all healthy heterosexual marriages,
Replace all school counselors in grades K-12 with agents of Colombian and Jamaican drug cartels,
Establish planetary chain of "homo breeding gulags" where over-medicated imprisoned straight women are turned into artificially impregnated baby factories to produce prepubescent love slaves for our devotedly pederastic gay leadership,
bulldoze all more...