Horse Jokes / Recent Jokes
An old cowhand came riding into town on a hot, dry, dusty day.The local sheriff watched from his chair in front of the saloon as the cowboy wearily dismounted and tied his horse to the rail.The cowboy then moved slowly to the back of his horse, lifted its tail, and placed a big kiss where the sun don't shine.He dropped the horse's tail, stepped up on the walk and aimed toward the swinging doors of the saloon."Hold on there, Mister," said the sheriff."Did I just see what I think I saw?""Reckon you did, Sheriff. I got me some powerful chapped lips.""And that cures them?" the Sheriff asked."Nope, but it keeps me from lick'en 'em."
What do you get if you cross a cow with a camel? Lumpy milkshakes! What is the definition of a goose? An animal that grows down as it grows up! Why did Bo Peep lose her sheep? She had a crook with her! What do you give a pony with a cold? Cough Stirrup! What animal always goes to bed with its shoes on? A horse! What happens when geese land in a volcano? They cook their own gooses! What do you call a pig with no clothes on? Streaky bacon! What is a horse's favorite sport? Stable tennis! What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk? An udder failure! What do you give a sick pig? Oinkment!
What happened to Lady Godiva's horse when he saw she had no clothes on? It made him shy!
Santa and Banta had just bought two horses. Now the problem was that they could not differenciate between the two horses. So, one day Santa cuts the left ear of his horse, so that it is easy to know that it is his horse. While doing so, an enemy of Santa looks at him. This enemy also cuts the left ear of banta. By doing so santa and banta come in confusion to differenciate. So, next thing santa keeps on cutting his horse`s right ear, then his tail, then makes him blind and so on. And the enemy also kept on doing so with banta`s horse. At last Santa`s horse had no legs left and banta`s horse was with one leg only. The enemy also went and cut banta`s horse one leg. So, in the morning it was the same sitaution, How to diffrenciate thier horses. So, after thinking and putting lots of effort to thier mind - Santa said - O. K You keep the black one and i will keep the white.
A bunch of Indians capture a cowboy and bring him back to their camp to meet the chief. The chief says to the cowboy, "You going to die. But we sorry for you, so give you one wish a day for three days. On sundown of third day, you die. What is first wish?"
The cowboy says, "I want to see my horse." The Indians get his horse. The cowboy grabs the horse's ear and whispers something, then slaps the horse on the back. The horse takes off. Two hours later, the horse comes back with a naked blonde. She jumps off the horse and goes into the teepee with the cowboy. The Indians look at each other, figuring, "Typical white man - can only think of one thing."
The second day, the chief says, "What your wish today?" The cowboy says, "I want to see my horse again." The Indians bring him his horse. The cowboy leans over to the horse and whispers something in the horse's ear, then slaps it on the back. Two hours later, the horse comes back more...
What happened to the horse that swallowed a dollar bill? It bucked!