Hymie Jokes / Recent Jokes

The Arab and the little old Jewish man
An Arab was walking through the Sahara desert, desperate for water, when he saw something, far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he walked towards the image, only to find Hymie sitting at a card table with a bunch of ties laid out on it.
The Arab asked "Please, I`m dying of thirst, can I have some water?".
Hymie replied "I don`t have any water, but why don`t you buy a tie? Here`s one that goes nicely with your robes."
The Arab replied, "I don`t want a tie, I need water."
"OK, don`t buy a tie. But to show you what a nice guy I am, I`ll tell you that over that hill there, about 4 miles, is a nice restaurant. Walk that way, they`ll give you all the water you want."
The Arab thanked him and walked away towards the hill and eventually disappeared. Three hours later the Arab came crawling back to where Hymie was sitting behind his card table.
Hymie said "I told more...

Isaac and Hymie were two tired Brooklyn businessmen who wereordered to take a Caribbean cruise by their doctors. The second nightout on the way to Martinique they were leaning against the rail, looking at the big bright tropical moon on the sea, really startingto unwind. Suddenly the rail broke and both Jews fell screaming into theocean. They came up gasping and spluttering and saw the ship sailingaway from them into the darkness. As Isaac had fallen overboard he hadmanaged to grab a life preserver, and now he clung to it, desperatelytreading water. "Hyman!" he called out, "Hyman, can you float alone?""Oy vay!" called out Hymie from the dark waters. "Vat a time totalk business!"