Ikea Jokes

Q: How many IKEA shop assistans does it take to change a light bulb?
A: "Sorry, we ran out of light bulb stock. We expect it to arrive early next month. We do have ladders though! You just go straight on, then left and then right. No, thanks, anytime."

I work as a systems administrator, and part of m job involves answering questions about computers. I generally like my job, but sometimes it gets on my nerves. When people ask me what I find so irritating, this is what I tell them:Imagine that you are a salesperson for Ikea (substitute "furniture store" if you don't know what "Ikea" is). You get a phone call that goes like this.Customer: I'd like to buy a kitchen table.You: That's fine; we have many styles of kitchen tables, I'm sure you can find one you like.C: I need one that's 3 feet by 5 feet and has a butcher block top.Y: Yes, we have a table like that. You can pick it up today.C: OK, how can I get it back to my house? Y: Well, it comes disassembled, so you can just put it on a roof rack. We can loan you a roof rack if you don't have one.C: But how do get there? Y: We're just off exit 25 of the Turnpike. Where are you coming from? C: Wait, wait, you're going way too fast for me. I have a Ford in my driveway, more...

I work as a systems administrator, and part of m job involves answering questions about computers. I generally like my job, but sometimes it gets on my nerves. When people ask me what I find so irritating, this is what I tell them:

Imagine that you are a salesperson for Ikea (substitute "furniture store" if you don`t know what "Ikea" is). You get a phone call that goes like this.

Customer: I`d like to buy a kitchen table.
You: That`s fine; we have many styles of kitchen tables, I`m sure you can find one you like.
C: I need one that`s 3 feet by 5 feet and has a butcher block top.
Y: Yes, we have a table like that. You can pick it up today.
C: OK, how can I get it back to my house?
Y: Well, it comes disassembled, so you can just put it on a roof rack. We can loan you a roof rack if you don`t have one.
C: But how do get there?
Y: We`re just off exit 25 of the Turnpike. Where are you coming from?
C: Wait, more...

I work as a systems administrator, and part of m job involves answering questions about computers. I generally like my job, but sometimes it gets on my nerves. When people ask me what I find so irritating, this is what I tell them: Imagine that you are a salesperson for Ikea (substitute "furniture store" if you don't know what "Ikea" is). You get a phone call that goes like this. Customer: I'd like to buy a kitchen table. You: That's fine; we have many styles of kitchen tables, I'm sure you can find one you like. C: I need one that's 3 feet by 5 feet and has a butcher block top. Y: Yes, we have a table like that. You can pick it up today. C: OK, how can I get it back to my house? Y: Well, it comes disassembled, so you can just put it on a roof rack. We can loan you a roof rack if you don't have one. C: But how do get there? Y: We're just off exit 25 of the Turnpike. Where are you coming from? C: Wait, wait, you're going way too fast for me. I have a Ford in my more...