Indian Jokes / Recent Jokes
A newly-employed villager was very weak in English. Once he asked his more educated neighbour to draft an application asking for casual leave for a day as he was down with fever.
The neighbour dictated the application in the following words: "Respected Sir - As I am suffering from fever, I may kindly be granted casual leave for today."
He kept a copy of this application for subsequent use. Later, on the eve of his sister's marriage, he wrote an application on his own. It read as follows: "Respected Sir -As I am suffering from my sister's marriage tomorrow, kindly grant me casual leave for the next two days."
Banta had a toothache; so he went to a dentist. After examining Banta's teeth, the dentist stated that one tooth had to be extracted. Banta got very worried about the pain he might have to suffer.
The dentist told him,' Don't worry, I will use a local anaesthetic and you will not feel any pain when the tooth is extracted.'
Banta consoled the dentist,' Doctor, I am glad that these days when people are crazy about foreign things, you prefer local products.'
There's an indian who walks into a 7-11 and asks if they have toliet paper. The clerk says yes and takes him to the approiate aisle. The indian asks "how much is this White Cloud toliet paper?" The clerk says "2. 49 a role." The Indian says "oh, no, too much!!" Then he asks "how much is the Scotts toliet paper?" The clerk says "1. 99 a role." The indian says, "oh, no, still too much!!!" Then he asks "how much is this no name toliet paper?" The clerk says ". 10 a role." The indian says "I'll take 10 roles." The indian goes home and comes back the next day. He says to the clerk "I have new name for no name toliet paper. John Wayne toliet paper, because it's rough, and tough, and doesn't take no shit from indians!"
This story, highlights the humiliations civil servants have to suffer at the hands of ministers.
There was this civil servant who retired after 40 years of slogging in his office. He rented a small cottage near a village and went into a self-imposed Vanprastha. The villagers became very curious about him. But all they saw was that every morning a boy came to his door, rang the bell and spoke a sentence. The civil servant replied with a sentence and handed him a coin. When curiosity got the better of the village folk, they approached the boy and asked him what passed between them:' Nothing much", replied the lad.' He's hired me to ring his bell and say to him: "Sir, the Minister wants to see you!" And he replies: "Tell the bloody Minister to bugger off." For this he pays me ten pence a time.'
This Indian boy goes to his mother one day with a puzzled look on his face.
"Say, mom, why is my bigger brother named "Mighty Storm"?
"Because he was conceived during a mighty storm."
"Why is my sister named "Cornflower"?
"Well, your father and I were in a cornfield, when we made her."
"And why is my other sister called "Moonchild"?
"We were watching the moon landing while she was conceived."
"Tell me, Torn Rubber, why are you so curious?"
The doctor told Banta that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 300 days, he would loose 34 kgs. At the end of 300 days, Banta called the doctor to report that he had lost the weight, but he had a problem.
'What's the problem?' asked the doctor.
'I am 2, 400 kms from home,' replied Banta.