Indian Jokes / Recent Jokes
Two cowboys came riding around a bend in the trail and saw an indian on
the ground. His head was tilted with his ear on the ground. When he saw
the cowboys he said, "Three men, large wagon, four horses". One of the
cowboys asked in amazement, "You can tell all that just by listening to the
ground"?
"No", said the indian, "They ran over me....".
TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You retire on the income.
INDIAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You worship them.
PAKISTAN ECONOMICS
You don't have any cows.
You claim that the Indian cows belong to you.
You ask the US for financial aid, China for military aid, Britain for warplanes, Italy for machines, Germany for technology, France for submarines, Switzerland for loans, Russia for drugs and Japan for equipment.
You buy the cows with all this and claim of exploitation by the world.
AMERICAN ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
You profess surprise when the cow drops dead.
You put the blame on some nation with cows & naturally that nation will be a danger to mankind.
You wage a war to save the world and grab the cows.
FRENCH ECONOMICS
You have two cows.
You go on more...
A bengali and indian and a english and a PAKI enter into a bar... all of a sudden the bengali throw's his glass in the air takes out his shot gun and shoot's it.... hes say's'Glasses in bangledesh are so cheap u dont use with the same one twice.... soon the indian throws his glass in the air and shoot's it... he too says that glasses in indian are so cheap u dont use the same one twice.... The enlish throws his glass in the air shoot's it then shoots the PAKI..... He says that there are soooo PAKI'S in ENGLAND u dont drink with the same one twice....; )
In Aurangabad, 1968, in conjunction with the sisters of the Holy Cross, I was organist and choirmaster for a Christmas Carol Service. A number of officials were invited to read selected portions from the Scriptures. One portion: "The treasures will be opened and the glories of God will be revealed' was read as: "The trousers will be opened and the glories of God will be revealed.'
A desi dies and goes to hell. There he finds that there is a different hell for each country. He goes first to the German hell and asks What do they do here?"
He is told "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the German devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."
The man does not like the sound of that at all, so he moves on. He checks out the USA hell as well as the Russian hell and many more. He discovers that they are all more or less the same as the German hell.
Then he comes to the Indian hell and finds that there is a very long line of people waiting to get in. Amazed he asks, "What do they do here?"
He is told "First they put you in anelectric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the Indian devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."
"But that is exactly the same as all the other more...
THIS is attributed to Rajaji: Before IndepenÂdence, he was arguing with an Englishman about India's freedom. The Englishman retorted,' Look here! We have spent millions of pounds here - building cities, laying roads, railways and canals. We have built dams and barrages, universities, hospitals; opened mines; built ports and harbours, and so on. Do you seriously ask us to pack up bag and baggage and leave India?'
'No said Rajaji,' please leave the bag and baggage behind.'
1. At the time of marriage, a north Indian girl has more boyfriends than her age. 2. Before marriage, she looks almost like a bollywood heroine and after marriage you have to go around her twice to completely hug her. 3. By the time she professes her undevoted love to you, you are bankrupt because of the number of times you had to take her out to movies, theatres and restaurants. And you wait longingly for her dowry. 4. The only dishes she can think of to cook is paneer butter masala, aloo sabji, aloo Gobi sabji, aloo matar, aloo paneer, that after eating all those paneer and aloos you are either in the bed with chronic cholestrol or chronic gas disorder. 5. The only growth that you see later in your career is the rise in your monthly phone bill. 6. You are blinded by her love that you think that she is a blonde. Only later do you come to know that it is because of the mehandhi that she applies to cover her grey hair. 7. When you come home from office she is very busy watching more...