Insanity Jokes / Recent Jokes
A wife, one evening, drew her husband`s attention to the young couple next door and said,
"Do you see those two? How devoted they are? He kisses his young bride every time they meet. Why don`t you do that?"
"I would love to," replied the husband, "but I don`t know her well enough."
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I am reading a most interesting book about anti-gravity. I just can`t put it down.
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I don`t buy temporary insanity as a murder defense. Because people kill people. That`s and animal instinct. I think breaking into someone`s home and ironing all their clothes is temporary insanity.
Worse was the alleged rapist who stood before the judge and pleaded innocence by reason of insanity.
"Insanity?" coughed the judge. "Young man, you seem perfectly normal to me."
"Oh, I am," he admitted, "it's sex I'm crazy about."
Insanity is hereditary. Parents get it from their kids.
Insanity is one mind working in two different directions at once.
Some Warning Signs of Insanity
- You write to your mother in Germany every week, even though she sends you mail from Iowa asking why you never write.
- You're always having to apologize to your next door neighbor for setting fire to his lawn decorations.
- Nobody listens to you anymore, because they can't understand you through that scuba mask.
- You begin to stop and consider all of the blades of grass you've stepped on as a child, and worry that their ancestors are going to one day seek revenge.
- You have meaningful conversations with your toaster.
- You collect dead windowsill flies.
- Every time the phone rings, you shout, "Hey! An angel just got its wings!"
- You like cats. Especially with mayo.
- You cry at the end of every episode of Gilligan's Island, because they weren't rescued.
- You put tennis balls in the microwave to see if they'll hatch.
- Whenever you listen to the radio, the music sounds backwards.
- You have more...