Japan Jokes / Recent Jokes

The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.Tokyo, Japan:A bull bound for slaughter gave its handlers the slip Wednesday and escaped into Tokyo's teeming streets.The 1,300-pound bull, shipped in from southern Japan, thundered down the gangplank as soon as it was lowered, bolted past port police and headed for the wide open spaces.More than 20 policeman chased the animal for 40 minutes through nearly three miles of city traffic before managing to herd it into the parking lot of a posh hotel. Waiting patrol cars formed a makeshift corral to avert another escape.Police then roped the bull's horns and tied it to a tree until the owner came to transport it.

There was a Japanese man who went to America for sightseeing. On the last day, he hailed a cab and told the driver to drive to the airport. During the journey, a Honda drove past the taxi. Thereupon, the man leaned out of the window excitedly and yelled, “Honda, very fast! Made in Japan! ”
After a while, a Toyota sped past the taxi. Again, the Japanese man leaned out of the window and yelled, “Toyota, very fast! Made in Japan! ”
And then a Mitsubishi sped past the taxi. For the third time, the Japanese leaned out of the window and yelled, “Mitsubishi, very fast! Made in Japan! ”
The driver was a little angry, but he kept quiet. And this went on for quite a number of cars. Finally, the taxi came to the airport. The fare was US$300.
The Japanese exclaimed, “Wah… so expensive! ”
There upon, the driver yelled back, “Meter, very fast! Made in Japan! ”

In Japan, they have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with Haiku poetry messages. They're used to communicate a timeless message, often achieving a wistful, yearning and powerful insight through extreme brevity. Here are 16 actual error messages from
Japan:

The Web site you seek Cannot be located, but Countless more exist.

Chaos reigns within. Reflect, repent, and reboot. Order shall return.

Program aborting: Close all that you have worked on. You ask far too much.

Windows NT crashed. I am the Blue Screen of Death. No one hears your screams.

Yesterday it worked. Today it is not working. Windows is like that.

Your file was so big. It might be very useful. But now it is gone.

Stay the patient course. Of little worth is your ire. The network is down.

A crash reduces Your expensive computer To a simple stone.

Three things are certain: Death, taxes and lost more...

Japan meters

Japanese tourist arrived in New Delhi. While travelling a taxi, he happened
to observe that everything in India moved at a slower pace compared to his own
country. Unable to contain himself, he said to the taxi driver, "Your taxis
are slow, Japanese taxis go very fast. Look at your buses, They ply at snail's
pace. In Japan buses run like hell. Look at speed of your Motor cycles, Japan
motor cycles seem to talk to air". At the end of Journey, the taxi fare
amounted to Rs 100/-.
What! exclaimed the furious Japanese. "Your meter runs too fast".
"Yes, Why not? ", said the taxi driver. "It's after all made in Japan, Sir! ".

A 100-year old Japanese driver, who had been in two recent hit-and-run accidents and was arrested after his car hit an umbrella held by a child, said driving was his way to avoid senility.

Police said his driving nearly helped the child avoid senility, too.

Toyota announced that it is developing a car that shuts down if the driver is drunk. Immediately, rival Ford announced that "Ford drivers do not need to be drunk for their cars to shut down."

There was a Japanese man who went to America for sightseeing. On the last day, he hailed a cab and told the driver to drive to the airport. During the journey, a Honda drove past the taxi. Thereupon, the man leaned out of the window excitedly and yelled, "Honda, very fast! Made in Japan!"After a while, a Toyota sped past the taxi. Again, the Japanese man leaned out of the window and yelled, "Toyota, very fast! Made in Japan!"And then a Mitsubishi sped past the taxi. For the third time, the Japanese leaned out of the window and yelled, "Mitsubishi, very fast! Made in Japan!"The driver was a little angry, but he kept quiet. And this went on for quite a number of cars. Finally, the taxi came to the airport. The fare was US$300. The Japanese exclaimed, "Wah... so expensive!"There upon, the driver yelled back, "Meter, very fast! Made in Japan!"