Jedi Jokes / Recent Jokes

You might be a Redneck Jedi if...===========================================* You ever heard the phrase, "May the force be with y'all." * Your Jedi robe is camouflage. * You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Bud Light. * At least one wing of your X-Wings is primer colored. * You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok. * You have ever had a land-speeder up on blocks in your yard. * The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum skeeters. * Wookiees are offended by your B. O. * You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial. * You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing or bowling. * Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over to the dark side... it'll be a hoot." * You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the barbecue grill to light up. * You have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your land-speeder. * You more...

Your Jedi robe is a Camouflage colour.
You have ever used your Light Saber to open a bottle of Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill.
You think the best use of your light saber is picking your teeth.
At least one wing of your X-Wing is primer colored.
There is a blaster rack in the back of your landspeeder.
You have bantha horns on the front of your landspeeder.
You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok. ('cause today's the day the teddy bears have their picnic)
You can find no grammatical errors in the way Yoda talks.
You think that the Stormtroopers Elite Guards are just KKK members with really good sheets.
A peaceful meditation session is one without gas.
You can levitate yourself using a force from within, but not THE FORCE.
Your master ever said "My finger you will pull..hmmm?"
You have ever had an X-wing up on blocks in your yard.
You ever lost a hand during a light-saber fight because you had to spit.
The worst part of more...

You know you're a redneck jedi when.. You hear "Luke, I am your father... and your uncle..." You ever said the phrase, "May the force be with y'all." Your Jedi robe is camouflage. You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Bud Light. At least one wing of your X-Wings is primer colored. You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok. You have ever had a land-speeder up on blocks in your yard. The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum skeeters. Wookiees are offended by your B.O. You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial. You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing or bowling. You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the barbecue grill to light up. You have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your land-speeder. You ever fantasized about Princess Leia wearing Daisy Duke shorts. You have the doors of your X-wing welded shut and more...

You're able to easily describe the taste of an Ewok.
Wookiees are offended by your B.O.
Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over t' the dark side... it'll be a hoot."
You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.
Your Jedi robe is a camouflage color.
You've heard the phrase, "May the force be with y'all".
At least one wing of your X-Wings is primer colored.
You have ever had an X-wing up on blocks in your yard.
The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum skeeters.
You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the BBQ grill to light.
You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing/bowling.
You have a relative that closely resembles Chewbacca.
You have ever used your Light Saber to open a bottle of beer.
If you hear... "Luke, I am your father... and your uncle."

Y. O. D. A (To the Village People's "Y. M. C. A")
(As sung by master Yoda, on meeting Luke Skywalker).
YOUNG MAN, I saw your ship come down. I said YOUNG MAN, now it's muddy and brown. I said YOUNG MAN, put your weapon away, 'cause I *MEAN* *YOU* *NO* *HARM* *I* *SAY* YOUNG MAN, There's no need to feel fear. I am WONDERIN', tell me why are you here? How you GROWIN', from this food on the plate, I say *WARS* *DO* *NOT* *MAKE* *ONE* *GREAT*
You must be here to see Y. O. D. A You must be here to see Y. O. D. A. He's 900 years old! He's so strong in the Force! Do your Jedi Diploma course!
You must be here to see Y. O. D. A You must be here to see Y. O. D. A Come and get yourself clean! Come and have a good meal! Pretty soon now, the Force you'll feel!
YOUNG MAN, you fell out of the sky, into SOMETHIN' brown that smells like a sty, and this TIN CAN started swimming and then, he got *SPAT* *OUT* *LIKE* *SOME* *THROAT* *PHLEGM* YOUNG MAN, Welcome to Dagobah. He more...

Y. O. D. A (To the Village People's "Y. M. C. A")(As sung by master Yoda, on meeting Luke Skywalker). YOUNG MAN, I saw your ship come down. I saidYOUNG MAN, now it's muddy and brown. I saidYOUNG MAN, put your weapon away, 'cause I*MEAN* *YOU* *NO* *HARM* *I* *SAY*YOUNG MAN, There's no need to feel fear. I amWONDERIN', tell me why are you here? How youGROWIN', from this food on the plate, I say*WARS* *DO* *NOT* *MAKE* *ONE* *GREAT*You must be here to see Y. O. D. AYou must be here to see Y. O. D. A. He's 900 years old! He's so strong in the Force! Do your Jedi Diploma course! You must be here to see Y. O. D. AYou must be here to see Y. O. D. ACome and get yourself clean! Come and have a good meal! Pretty soon now, the Force you'll feel! YOUNG MAN, you fell out of the sky, intoSOMETHIN' brown that smells like a sty, and thisTIN CAN started swimming and then, he got*SPAT* *OUT* *LIKE* *SOME* *THROAT* *PHLEGM*YOUNG MAN, Welcome to Dagobah. He isCOMIN', master Yoda not far. I'll more...

Y. O. D. A (To the Village People's "Y. M. C. A")(As sung by master Yoda, on meeting Luke Skywalker). YOUNG MAN, I saw your ship come down. I saidYOUNG MAN, now it's muddy and brown. I saidYOUNG MAN, put your weapon away,' cause I*MEAN* *YOU* *NO* *HARM* *I* *SAY*YOUNG MAN, There's no need to feel fear. I amWONDERIN', tell me why are you here? How youGROWIN', from this food on the plate, I say*WARS* *DO* *NOT* *MAKE* *ONE* *GREAT*You must be here to see Y. O. D. AYou must be here to see Y. O. D. A. He's 900 years old! He's so strong in the Force! Do your Jedi Diploma course! You must be here to see Y. O. D. AYou must be here to see Y. O. D. ACome and get yourself clean! Come and have a good meal! Pretty soon now, the Force you'll feel! YOUNG MAN, you fell out of the sky, intoSOMETHIN' brown that smells like a sty, and thisTIN CAN started swimming and then, he got*SPAT* *OUT* *LIKE* *SOME* *THROAT* *PHLEGM*YOUNG MAN, Welcome to Dagobah. He isCOMIN', master Yoda not far. I'll more...