Kanjibhai Jokes

Kanjibhai was preparing wedding cards for their son at the printers. Kanjibhai was not very good at English so he asked the printer to help him.

After the printer had presented Kanjibhai with a draft, Kanjibhai quickly pointed out that the " RSVP " was missing.
The printer was surprised by Kanjibhai's knowledge and asked him if Kanjibhai knew what it meant.

Kanjibhai started to think and after much thought he replied:
" "Vait! I remember! I remember! RSVP!! It means "Remember, Send Vedding Present!"

Kanjibhai patted his daughter's hand fondly, and told her, "Dikri, Your young man told me today he wanted you as a bride, and I gave my consent."
Oh, Bapuji, " gushed the daughter, "it's going to be so hard leaving mother."

"I understand perfectly, my dear," beamed Kanjibhai "You just take her with you."

Kanjibhai mentioned to his landlord about the tenants in the apartment over his. "Many a night they stamp on the floor and shout till midnight."
When the landlord asked if it bothered him, he replied, "Not
really, as I usually stay up and practice my Harmonium till about that time most every night anyway."

Kanjibhai the jeweller called the police station to report a robbery. "You'll never believe what happened, Officer. A truck backed up to my store, the doors opened and an elephant came out. He broke my plate glass window, stuck his trunk in, sucked up all the jewellery and climbed back into the truck.
The doors closed and the truck pulled away."

The Pandu hawaldar said, "Could you tell me, for identification purposes, whether it was an Indian elephant or an African elephant?"

"What's the difference?" asked Kanjibhai Jaweri.

"Well," said the Hawaldar, "an African elephant has great big ears and an Indian elephant has little ears."

"Come to think of it, I couldn't see his ears," said Kanjibhai "He had a stocking over his head."

Rupaben's husband kanjibhai asked her what she wanted for her birthday.

She thought for a moment and remembering the diamonds in the deck of cards said, "this year i just want cold, hard cash for a change."

The following day kanjibhai filled her request.

He put 200 rupee coins into a glass jar, then filled it with water and placed it in the freezer.

On her birthday he handed his wife a solidly frozen bottle of change.