Listener Jokes

It was a musical program on Hiru FM. Two famous sinhala songs were on top of the chart and it was the chance of a listener to select the winning song.
The caller was Nimal, from Mahara. The announcer asked the caller, "Haa Nimal dan kiyanda balanda oya wedipurama kemathi Samithage' Rana Hansa Yuwalatada' ehema nathnam Shashika Nisansalage' Thol pethi witharakda' kiyala.
And the listener started giggling while saying
"Hmmm samithage rana hansa yuwalata thamai mama wediyenma kemathi, habai shashikage thol pethith naraka naha!", and the program quickly switched to a commercial break. ...: -

TALKSHOW: KQED radio announced a few days ago that due to lack of
funding, it was canceling its Perspectives commentaries. Next
morning, Doug Edwards was checking the call-in tape for listener
reaction and came across this from a women on her car phone: "My
name is Julia. Longtime listener. I'm very upset that you're canceling
Perspectives and I'm considering canceling my support. Please
reinstate -," followed by the sound of squealing brakes, a crash,
shattering glass, and Julia yelling "Oh s..., you've made me so mad
I just rear-ended the f...er in front of me. Have to go now." Click.
Poor Julia. Funds were restored, and Perspectives is back on the air.
[KQED is a listener supported public radio station.]

If a listener nods his head when you're explaining your program, wake him up.

A good listener is usually thinking about something else.

CARELESS LISTENER REGRETS
by Edith Scharff
-------------------
When God gave out brains,
I thought He said trains,
and I missed mine.
When God gave out looks,
I thought He said books,
and I didn't want any.
When God gave out noses,
I thought He said roses,
and I asked for a red one.
When God gave out legs,
I thought He said kegs,
and I ordered two fat ones.
When God gave out ears,
I thought He said beers,
and I ordered two long ones.
When God gave out chins,
I thought He said gins,
and I ordered a double.
When God gave out heads,
I thought He said beds,
and I asked for a soft one.
Gee, am I a mess!