Lotto Jokes / Recent Jokes

Which condom would you use.... Nike Condoms: Just do it. Toyota Condoms: Oh what a feeling. Diet Pepsi Condoms: You got the right one, baby. Pringles Condoms: Once you pop, you can't stop. Mentos Condoms: The freshmaker. Flintstones Vitamins Condom Pack: Ten million strong and growing. Secret Condoms: Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman. Macintosh Condoms: It does more, it costs less, its that simple. Ford Condoms: The best never rest. Chevy Condoms: Like a rock. Dial Condoms: Aren't you glad you use it? Don't you wish everybody did? New York Lotto Condoms: Cause hey-- you never know. California Lotto Condoms: Who's next? Avis Condoms: Trying harder than ever. KFC Condoms: Finger-Licking Good. Coca Cola Condoms: Always a Real Thing. Lays Condoms: Betcha can't have just one. Cambells Soup Condoms: Mm, mm good. The Carl's Jr. Condom: If it doesn't get all over the place, it doesn't belong in your face... General Electric: We bring good things to life! AT&T condom:' Reach out more...

One day, the wife comes home with a spectacular diamond ring. "Where did you get that ring?" her husband asks. "Well, she replies, "my boss and I played the lotto and we won, so I bought it with my share of the winnings. A week later, his wife comes home with a long shiny fur coat. "Where did you get that coat?" her husband asks. She replies "My boss and played the lotto and we won again, so I bought it with my share of the winnings. Another week later, his wife comes home, driving in a red Ferrari. "Where did you get that car?" her husband asks. Again she repeats the same story about the lotto and her share of the winnings. That night, his wife asks him to pour her a nice warm bath while she gets undressed. When she enters the bathroom, she find that there is barely enough water in the bath to cover the plug at the far end. "And this?" she asks her husband. " Well," he replies, "we don't want to get your lotto more...

A guy named Joe finds himself in dire trouble. His business started going bust and he found himself in serious financial trouble. He was so desperate that he decided to pray for help. "Oh Lord, please help me, I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well, please let me win the lotto". Lotto night arrived and somebody else won the prize. Joe again looked up and prayed... "Oh Lord, please let me win the lotto! I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well". Again, Lotto night came and went and Joe still had no luck. Once again, he prayed... "Oh, Lord, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my business, my house and my car. My wife and children are starving. I don't often ask you for help and I have always been a good servant to you. Please just let me win the lotto this one time so I can get my life back in order. .. " Suddenly there was a blinding flash of light as the heavens opened and Joe more...

Which condom would you use?
>
>Nike Condoms: Just do it.
>
>Toyota Condoms: Oh what a feeling.
>
>Diet Pepsi Condoms: You got the right one, baby.
>
>Pringles Condoms: Once you pop, you can't stop.
>
>Mentos Condoms: The freshmaker.
>
>Flintstones Vitamins Condom Pack: Ten millon strong and growing.
>
>Secret Condoms: Strong enough for a man, but Ph balanced for a woman.
>
>Macintosh Condoms: It does more, it costs less, its that simple.
>
>Ford Condoms: The best never rest.
>
>Chevy Condoms: Like a rock.
>
>Dial Condoms: Aren't you glad you use it? Don't you wish everybody did?
>
>New York Lotto Condoms: Cause hey... you never know.
>
>California Lotto Condoms: Who's next?
>
>Avis Condoms: Trying harder than ever.
>
>KFC Condoms: Finger-Licking Good.
>
>Coca Cola Condoms: Always the Real Thing.
>
>Lays Condoms: more...

Nike Condoms: Just do it.

Toyota Condoms: Oh what a feeling.

Diet Pepsi Condoms: You got the right one, baby.

Pringles Condoms: Once you pop, you can't stop.

Mentos Condoms: The freshmaker.

Flintstones Vitamins Condom Pack: Ten million strong and growing.

Secret Condoms: Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman.

Macintosh Condoms: It does more, it costs less, its that simple.

Ford Condoms: The best never rest.

Chevy Condoms: Like a rock.

Dial Condoms: Aren't you glad you use it? Don't you wish everybody did?

New York Lotto Condoms: Cause hey-- you never know.

California Lotto Condoms: Who's next?

Avis Condoms: Trying harder than ever.

KFC Condoms: Finger-Licking Good.

Coca Cola Condoms: Always a Real Thing.

Lays Condoms: Betcha can't have just one.

Cambells Soup Condoms: Mm, mm more...

A guy named Joe finds himself in dire trouble. His business has gone bust and he's in serious
financial trouble. He's so desperate that he decides to ask God for help. He begins to pray...
'God, please help me, I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my
house as well, please let me win the lotto."
Lotto night comes and somebody else wins it. Joe again prays...'God, please let me win the
lotto, I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well.'
Lotto night comes and Joe still has no luck!! Once again, he prays...'My God, why have you
forsaken me?? I've lost my business, my house, my car and my wife and children are starving. I
don't often ask you for help and I have always been a good servant to you. Why won't you just
let me win the lotto this one time so I can get my life back in order???'
Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the heavens open and Joe is confronted by more...

A Jewish guy called Jacob finds himself in dire trouble. His business has gone bust and he's in serious financial trouble. He's so desperate that he decides to ask God for help. He goes into the synagogue and begins to pray
"God, please help me, I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well, please let me win the lotto".
Lotto night comes and somebody else wins it.
Jacob goes back to the synagogue.
"God, please let me win the lotto, I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well".
Lotto night comes and Jacob still has no luck!!
Back to the synagogue.
"My God, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my business, my house, my car and my wife and children are starving. I don't often ask you for help and I have always been a good servant to you. Why won't you just let me win the lotto this one time so I can get my life back in order???".
Suddenly there is a blinding more...