Luxury Jokes / Recent Jokes
Three men died and went to heaven. Upon their arrival, St. Peter asked the first man if he had been faithful to his wife. The man admitted to two affairs during his marriage. St. Peter told him that he could receive only a compact car to drive in heaven.
Then St. Peter asked the second man if he had been faithful to his wife and the man admitted to one affair. St. Peter told him he would be given a midsize car to drive.
The third man was asked about his faithfulness, and he told St. Peter he had been true to his wife until the day he died. St. Peter praised him and gave him a luxury car.
A week later, the three men were driving around and they all stopped at a red light. The men in thee compact and midsize cars turned to see the man in the luxury car crying. They asked him what could possibly be the matter - after all, he was driving a luxury car.
"I just passed my wife." he told them. "and she was on a skateboard."
In reaction to N. Korea's nuclear test, the UN will ban trade on all luxury items going into the impoverished country.
Kim Jong Il, one of only 6 North Koreans that can afford luxury items anyway, declared "your ban can't hurt me, I'll just keep wearing my grandma's glasses!"
Three men died and stood in front of God.
God asked the first if he had been faithful to his wife. He admitted to four affairs during his marriage. God gave him a compact car to drive in heaven.
The second man admitted to only two affair and was given a midsize car.
The third man was asked the same question and said that he had been faithful to his wife until the day he died. God praised him and gave him a big luxury car.
A week later the three guys met in a parking lot. The man driving the luxury car began to cry.
“What’s the matter? ”
“I just passed my wife, and she was on a skateboard! ”
When St. Peter was at the Pearly Gates, three priest were sent up to heaven to be admitted on their repentance. The first priest was asked how many women he slept with and he answered that it was just one. St. Peter assigned him to a Luxury car and said that he would be using that while he is in heaven. The second answered that he slept with three and he was given a semi luxury car. The third was given an english mini as he slept with Ten. While the three priests got nto their respective vehicles and were driving around heaven; whoa..... whome do they meet? None other than Pope on a bicycle.
One day Banta walks into a dingy little storefront travel agency, holds up a page out of a newspaper, and says: "You say in this ad that you have a wonderful luxury cruise for only Rs 5000. I want to go on this wonderful luxury cruise."
The guy behind the counter says "Sure. Do you have five thousand in cash??"
"I sure do," says Banta, plunking the money down on the counter.
At that point, two big thugs leap out of a closet, whack Banta over the head, drag his unconscious body out the back door, stuff him in a barrel and drop the barrel into a river that flows past.
A few moments later, Santa walks into the same dingy storefront travel agency, holds up the newspaper ad and says: "I want to go on this wonderful luxury cruise."
The guy behind the counter says: "Sure, you got the fare in cash?"
"Yeah" says Santa, slapping the money on the counter.
Again, the two big thugs leap out, pound him on the more...