Malayalee Jokes / Recent Jokes

TV Shop: Shanavas went to the Calicut Radio Service outlet. He saw an interesting looking TV on the window. He went inside and asked a salesperson what the price of the TV was. The shop keeper replied immediately "Are you not Shanavas from Calicut? Sorry!!". Shanavas was disappointed. He went and changed into a kurtha paijama, got a fake moustache and came back to the shop and asked for the same TV. The shop keeper again said "Sorry, we can't help you!". Shanavas went to the barber, got his head shaved, put on an expensive pair of jeans and a pair of gloves, and bought borrowed an expensive bike from his friend and headed to the store. Again the reply was the same! He was so mad, he caught the salesperson on the shirt collar and shouted "Why won't you give me that damn TV?!". The salesperson said "Sorry sir, we cannot give you that TV because it's not a TV. It's a microwave oven!

It was our first batch tour. The whole batch were out site-seeing in beautiful Koadai Kanal. The scenery was so picteresque, almost everyone lost touch with reality. Everyone but the class representative Anoop S. Kollam and the tour co-ordinator Arun A. George. They counted the student heading into the buses. Realizing Shanavas was missing, they headed straight to the Police Station. Like true leaders, they went straight to the constable and stated "Sir, we have one person, out of the 200 who came on this tour, missing. We would like to start a search immediately to find this person.". The constable sat at his desk smiling. He said "Young men, everything is under control. I will find the missing person in five minutes!". Everyone was impressed by the reassuring tone of the constable. He went on to say "About ten minutes ago, one person came here reporting that the 199 persons who came with him on a tour was missing. He's waiting outside!"

Hi There!
You may prefer your girl friend to be like:
1) Alukkas Jewellery - "Ennum Oru Panathookam Munpil"
2) Sky Jewellery - "25 years of purity and trust"
3) Malabar Jewellery - "Where beauty meets Quality"
BUT NEVER BE LIKE:
4) Atlas Jewellery - "Jana kodikalude vishwastha stapanam"

Hi, I've been studyinbg Engineering @ Coimbatore for a year now. This thesis is from my experiance.
These laws have been proven to be accurate during an experiment using 21 malayalee Engineering students of Tamil Nadu, India.
1) The amount of time taken to study for a paper is inversely proportional to the marks obtained in that paper.
2) The amount of notes distributed by a lecturer corresponds inversely to the actual knowledge of that person on the subject.
3) The lecturer is always wrong, the only exception being when the person is reading from a text.
4) At any point of time, the deadline to submit a paper always comes two days ahead of the required time.
5) No matter how long you stare at the monitor, the Mailbox will not load in your college lab system until your allocated time is over.
6) Your code will develop errors only when a faculty member is within 5 mts of your person.
7) The amount of internal marks granted to a student is more...

Moral: An old-man that cannot lie
A very distinguished lady was on a plane arriving from Switzerland.
She found herself seated next to a nice priest whom she asked: "Excuse
meFather, could I ask a favor?"
"Of course my child, What can I do for you?"
"Here is the problem, I bought myself a new sophisticated hair remover
for which I paid an enormous sum of money. I have really gone
over the declaration limits and I am worried that they will confiscate
it at customs. Do you think you could hide it under your cassock?"
"Of course I could, my child, but you must realize that I cannot lie."
"You have such an honest face Father, I am sure they will not ask you
any questions", and she gave him the' hair remover'.
The aircraft arrived at its destination. When the priest presented
himself to customs he was asked, "Father, do you have anything to
declare?
"From more...

What is Bruce Lee's favorite weapon?
----- Kodaa Lee
According to Bruce Lee, which is the Venomous snake?
----- Ana Lee
Place where Bruce Lee stays when he is in Kerala?
----- Adima Lee
Bruce Lee's Favorite Malayalam Channel?
----- Kaira Lee
Bruce Lee favorite vegitable?
----- Thakkaa Lee
What sound does Bruce Lee make when some one hits him?
----- Nilavi Lee
What is Bruce Lee's pet?
------ Chunde Lee
What kind of water does Bruce Lee prefer with his lunch?
------ Karingaa Lee
What is Bruce Lee's Girl Friend's name?
------ Anaarka Lee
What is Bruce Lee's nick name?
------ Neeraa Lee
While in kerala he likes to be known?
------ Malaya Lee

diana, thanks for your compliment