Manmohan Jokes

While visiting India, George Bush is invited to tea with
Abdul Kalam. He asks Kalam what his leadership philosophy is. He says
that,
it is to surround himself with intelligent people.
Bush asks how he knows if they`re intelligent.
"I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Kalam.
"Allow me to demonstrate."
Bush watches as Kalam phones Manmohan Singh and says, "Mr. Prime
Minister,
please answer this question: your mother has a child, and your father
has a
child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"
Manmohan immediately responds, "It`s me, Sir! "
"Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the Kalam. He hangs up
and
says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?" Bush nods: "Yes Mr.
President. Thanks a lot. I`ll definitely be using that!" Bush, upon
returning to Washington, decides he`d better put the Condoleeza more...

Bush, Manmohan(indian prime minister), Aishwarya rai and Sonia(sonia gandhi head of opposition in indian goverment) are traveling in a train.

The train goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark.

Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. The women and Manmohan are sitting there looking perplexed.

Bush is bent over holding his face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic and nobody says anything.

Sonia is thinking: These Americans are all crazy after Aishwarya. Bush must have tried to kiss her in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him.

Aishwarya is thinking: Bush must have tried to kiss me but kissed Sonia instead and got slapped.

Bush is thinking: Damn it. Manmohan must have tried to kiss Aishwarya. She might have thought it was me and slapped me.

Manmohan is thinking: If this train goes through another tunnel I will make more...

Once george bush, osama bin laden, musharraf, manmohan singh & a schoolboy were travelling in a plane. Suddenly, the pilot
Came and said - "this plane is about to crash. Put on your parachutes and jump!" there were only 4 parachutes. Bush said - "i
Am the president of the most powerful country in the world. I should stay alive" - and he jumped off the plane. Bin laden
Said - "i am the most dangerous terrorist in the world. I should stay alive" - and he jumped off. Musharraf said - "i am the
Greatest supporter of osama as well as bush. I should stay alive" - and he jumped off. Manmohan said to the boy - "son, there
Is only one parachute left. You are the future of our country. You jump and let me die." the boy said - "don't worry sir,
There are 2 parachutes left." "how can you say that?" "musharraf uncle took my schoolbag!"

The train goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark.
Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. The women and Manmohan are sitting there looking perplexed.
Bush is bent over holding his face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic and nobody says anything.
Sonia is thinking: These Americans are all crazy after Aishwarya. Bush must have tried to kiss her in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him.
Aishwarya is thinking: Bush must have tried to kiss me but kissed Sonia instead and got slapped.
Bush is thinking: Damn it. Manmohan must have tried to kiss Aishwarya. She might have thought it was me and slapped me.
Manmohan is thinking: If this train goes through another tunnel I will make another kissing sound and slap Bush again.

WHEN the Bharatiya Janata Party came to power in the Centre after winning a mid-term poll, the Prime Minister L. K. Advani invited Dr Manmohan Singh to join the Union Cabinet as Finance Minister because he had successfully piloted and implemented the economic and fiscal policies of the BJP.
Dr Manmohan Singh accepted the offer graciously.
As soon as Banta Singh learnt about this, he rang up Dr Manmohan Singh:' O Bhai Manmohan Singha, tu te Congressi honda si, te Sanghi kadun tu ho giya?' (O, Manmohan Singh, you were a Congressman before; since when have you joined the BJP?)
Dr Manmohan Singh:' O Bhai Banta, Natey pahley main Congressi si, na hun main Sanghi nan, - main te pahle vi Finance Minister si, te hun vi Finance Minister han! (Neither was I a Congessman first nor am I a BJP man now; I was then a Finance Minister and I am now a Finance Minister.)