Marijuana Jokes / Recent Jokes
Governor Schwarzenegger says California should debate legalizing marijuana. Naturally Californians were way ahead of him and were already debating Dominos or Pizza Hut.
I want to know how they caught that much...
In 1990, the [United States] Customs Service launched six helium-filled balloons equipped with surveillance equipment to detect drug smuggling along the Mexican border.
The balloons cost $90 million to build and $30 million to operate during the thirty months in which agents seized only 3000 pounds of marijuana and nine weapons.
Even though this works out to $40000 for each pound of marijuana seized, Sen. Dennis DeConcini (D-Arizona) defended the program by pointing out that the low numbers prove the balloons are deterring smuggling activity.
The phone rings at FBI headquarters.
"Hello? I`m calling to report my neighbor, Clifford. He is hiding marijuana inside his firewood!"
"Thank you very much for the call, sir."
The next day, FBI agents descend on the neighbor`s house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They swear at the neighbors and leave.
The phone rings at the neighbors house. "Hey, Clifford, did the FBI come?"
"Yep."
"Did they chop your firewood?"
"Yep."
"Great, now it`s your turn to call. I need my garden plowed."
Working With The FBIThe phone rings at FBI headquarters." Hello?" "Hello, is this the FBI?" "Yes. What do you want?" "I'm calling to report my neighbor Adrian Thibodeaux! He ishiding marijuana inside his firewood." "Thank you very much for the call, sir." The next day, the FBI agents descend on Thibodeaux's house. Theysearch the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bustopen every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They swear atThibodeaux and leave. The phone rings at Thibodeaux's house." Hey, Adrian! Did the FBI come?" "Yeah!""Did they chop your firewood?" "Yep""Great, now it's your turn to call. I need my garden plowed."
The phone rings at FBI headquarters.
"Hello? I'm calling to report my neighbor, Clifford. He is hiding marijuana inside his firewood!"
"Thank you very much for the call, sir."
The next day, FBI agents descend on the neighbor's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They swear at the neighbors and leave.
The phone rings at the neighbors house. Hey, Clifford, did the FBI come?"
"Yep."
"Did they chop your firewood?"
"Yep."
"Great, now it's your turn to call. I need my garden plowed."
Excerpted from the book "Dumb, Dumber, Dumbest," (c) 1996 by John J Kohut and Roland Sweet
In 1990, the [United States] Customs Service launched six helium-filled balloons equipped with surveillance equipment to detect drug smuggling along the Mexican border.
The balloons cost $90 million to build and $30 million to operate during the thirty months in which agents seized only 3000 pounds of marijuana and nine weapons.
Even though this works out to $40000 for each pound of marijuana seized, Sen. Dennis DeConcini (D-Arizona) defended the program by pointing out that the low numbers prove the balloons are deterring smuggling activity.