Middle East Jokes / Recent Jokes

Apparently Iran would like to have some nuclear weapons.

Who can blame them? Getting nuclear weapons is sort of like being in the Hells Angels. It's not that people actually respect you or think you're any smarter or more important than you used to be, but they sure pretend to.

We, on the other hand, would not like Iran to have nuclear weapons. We would like them to have tea parties and crayons and possibly even Pop Rocks, but no nuclear weapons.

The interesting conundrum is this: We were the ones that gave them the stuff to build the weapons in the first place.

Because we wanted them to have nuclear weapons.

We did. But now we don't. See?

Happened with Iraq too.

We gave them loads of weapons but then decided we'd rather they didn't have them.

We wanted them to have them then.

But not now.

See?

Er, may I offer a suggestion?

I think this "Here, have some weapons/If you have more...

President Bush has a meeting with Iraq's Sunni vice president, Tariq al-Hashemi. The President said, “We’ve got to bring all the factions in Iraq together. The Shiites, the Sunis and the Sushis.”

A microphone Bush was unaware of caught him saying the "s"-word to Tony Blair.
Everyone was surprised that he pronounced "Syria" correctly.

According to the NYT, Congressman Phil Gingrey said that support for traditional marriage "is perhaps the best message we can give to the Middle East and all the trouble they're having over there right now."
Because the Middle East was conflict-free until the issue of gay marriage arose?

(Also, we've been giving them traditional marriage as a message for YEARS. Maybe the best message would be traditional trial separation. With a lot of counseling.)

A recent intelligence assessment has concluded that the Iraq war has actually increased the terrorism threat to the United States.
Upon hearing this, Venezualan President, Hugo Chavez declared, "If we'd known that, we would have been in favor of this war from the beginning."

Authorities in northern Cyprus believe they have found an ancient version of the Bible, written in Syriac, a dialect of the native language of Jesus. Historians and Theologians are giddy with excitement after reading the following prophecies that could only have been written by Jesus himself:
1) Do not get Judas anything for Christmas.
2) Scandals are great, but not so much in the snow.
3) Why am I still writing “B.C.” on my checks?
4) Hair decisions………….Ponytail, or Fabio??

Geroge Bush say`s his biggest regret was Iraq intelligence failure, while mine was voting for the S.O.B.