Midgets Jokes / Recent Jokes

One day three midgets decided they wanted to be in the record books the fist one says "I have pretty short arms", so he goes and succeeds. The second one says "I have pretty short legs," so he goes and succeeds. The third one says "I have a very small penis," and when he comes back he says "Who the hell is Leonardo DiCaprio?"

Q: How do you get 500 midgets into a Volkswagon?
A: You have to manufacture a Volkswagon large enough to accomidate 500 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 500 midgets into a Volkswagon is solved.
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There were three midgets. Each one wanted to win a world record.
The first midget went in to the place for world records and said I want to see if I have the worlds smallest hands.
He came happy and said i got the record.
So the second one goes in and says I want to see if I can get the record for the worlds smallest feet.
He came out all happy and said i got the record.
Then the last one goes in and said I want to see if I have the worlds smallest penis. He came out all sad and said, "Who the in the hell Michael Jackson?!"

Recently, our town received a grant to build housing for midgets.
According to our demographics, they figured that we should have six midgets living here. They sent enough money so that we could finance the building of homes and let the "little people" pay less than the going rate for rent.
Since we have only one "little person" living here it turns out that he won't have to pay anything for the only house we built, the subsidy covers everything.
We call it a Stay Free Mini Pad.

Recently, our town received a grant to build housing for midgets.
According to our demographics, they figured that we should have six
midgets living here. They sent enough money so that we could finance
the building of homes and let the "little people" pay less than the
going rate for rent.
Since we have only one "little person" living here it turns out that he
won't have to pay anything for the only house we built, the subsidy
covers everything.
We call it a Stay Free Mini Pad.