Miss Jokes / Recent Jokes
The president of the Miss Universe Organization said Miss USA Tara Conner will not be dethroned. They released a statement saying "The Organization and Mr. Donald J. Trump will be evaluating her behavioral and personal issues”...
And by “evaluating” Trump means, repeating the bathing suit portion of the contest. And by “personal”, he means; in his personal suite at The Trump Hotel.
Men should never marry a woman for her beauty alone. That is rather like buying a house just because you like the way it's painted.
My darling wife was always glum. I drowned her in a cask of rum, and so made sure that she would stay, in better spirits night and day.
My opinions are my wife's, and she says I'm damn lucky to have them.
My other wife is beautiful.
My wife and I have a perfect understanding; I don't try to run her life and I don't try to run mine.
My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it.
My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them.
My wife ran off with my best friend last week. Gawd, I miss him!
My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her.
My wife submits and I obey; she always lets me have her way.
Not all men are fools. Some are bachelors.
Nowadays, the only place a single woman can find the best man is at a wedding.
One of more...
Seems my latest Freudian slip came just as my wife arrived back from a week-long business trip in Toronto.
As she grabbed her luggage and headed off, she asked, "Did you miss me?"
I replied quite innocently, "It's been so hard without you."
Miss Piggy and an unnamed feral pig were married over the weekend.
The Swine Flu to Hawaii on flight H1N1 where they will honeymoon and be celebrity roasted.
Everybody thought the Miss Albuquerque beauty contest was going to be a hotly contested affair, but Susan walked away with first place with nary a dissenting vote. Turned out she was the only one of the contestants who could get all those letters across her chest.
Men should never marry a woman for her beauty alone. That is rather like buying a house just because you like the way it's painted.My darling wife was always glum. I drowned her in a cask of rum, and so made sure that she would stay, in better spirits night and day.My opinions are my wife's, and she says I'm damn lucky to have them.My other wife is beautiful.My wife and I have a perfect understanding; I don't try to run her life and I don't try to run mine.My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it.My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them.My wife ran off with my best friend last week. Gawd, I miss him! My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her.My wife submits and I obey; she always lets me have her way.Not all men are fools. Some are bachelors.Nowadays, the only place a single woman can find the best man is at a wedding.One of the safest ways to assure a happy marriage is to be sure more...
Seems my latest Freudian slip came just as my wife arrived back from a week-long business trip in Toronto.As she grabbed her luggage and headed off, she asked, "Did you miss me?"I replied quite innocently, "It's been so hard without you."