Miss Jokes / Recent Jokes

Linda and Jill are having coffee when Linda notices that Jill seems troubled and asks her, "Is something bugging you? You look anxious."

"Well, my boyfriend just lost all his money and life savings in the stock market," Jill explained.

"Oh, that's too bad," Linda sympathized. "I'm sure you're feeling sorry for him."

"Yeah, I am," Jill said. "He'll miss me."

Mr. Cikoch was a biology instructor at a snobby suburban girl's junior college. During class one day he asked his student, "Miss Simison, would you please name the organ of the human body, which under the appropriate conditions, expands to six times its normal size, and define the conditions."

Miss Simison gasped, and then said, "Mr. Cikoch, I don't think that is a proper question to ask me. I assure you my parents will hear of this. "With that she sat down red-faced.

Mr. Cikoch then called on Miss Hakar and asked the same question. Miss Hakar, with composure, replied, "The pupil of the eye, in dim light."

"Correct," said Mr. Cikoch. "And now, Miss Simison, I have three things to say to you. One, you have not studied your lesson. Two, you have a dirty mind. And three, you will some day be faced with a dreadful disappointment."

a good actor will smack there face
a bad actor will miss there face
a blonde actor will miss there face by turning there head the wrong way

I miss you like a retard misses the point.

The Top 10 Country Music Titles
1. Get Your Biscuits In The Oven and Your Buns in Bed.
2. Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye.
3. How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?
4. I Liked You Better Before I Knew You So Well.
5. I'm So Miserable Without You, It's Like Having You Here!
6. She Got The Ring and I Got The Finger.
7. I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim's Getting Better.
8. If I Had Shot You When I First Wanted To, I'd be Out By Now.
9. I Got In At 2 With A 10 and Woke Up At 10 With A 2.
10. I Hate Every Bone In Your Body, Except For Mine.

Teacher: What's this a picture of? Class: Don't know, Miss. Teacher: It's a kangaroo. Class: What's a kangaroo, miss? Teacher: A kangaroo is a native of Australia. Smallest boy: Wow, my sister's married one of them

What part of the human body," asked the anatomy professor, "is harder than steel?" Nobody in the class volunteered the information, so he looked in the direction of a sweet coed and asked, "Can you tell me, Miss Riley?"
She blushed a deep scarlet and lowered her eyes, murmuring, "Oh, please don't ask me to answer that, professor!"
Crisply, he said, "The answer is the tissue of the nails. And you, Miss Riley," he added with a sigh, "are an optimist."