Monica Jokes / Recent Jokes
One day as Monica Lewinsky was walking along the beach awaiting her Senate trial testimony, she came upon an ornate bottle that had washed up on shore. Curious, she picked it up, brushed off the sand, and lo and behold a genie popped out."Greetings, Miss Lewinsky," the genie said. "Since you have released me, I will grant you one wish.""Well," Monica replied, "I'm going to be on television alot for a while, and I want to look my best. I wish you would get rid of these love handles.""Your wish is my command," said the genie. A wave of his hands, a puff of smoke...And her ears promptly fell off.
Q: What's the difference between Monica Lewinsky and most other American women?
A: If they want a prick in the White House, the others just vote.
Q: What's the difference between Monica Lewinsky and the rest of us?
A: In order for us to get some dick in the White House, we had to go out and vote.
Q: How will history remember Bill Clinton?
A: The President after Bush.
Q: What's the difference between Bill Clinton and his dog Buddy?
A: One tries to hump the leg of every woman in the White House, the other is a chocolate Lab.
Q: What does Clinton say to interns as they leave his office?
A: "Don't hit your head on the desk."
Q: Did you hear about the Bill Clinton sale at clothing stores on President's day?
A: All pants half off.
Q: What do Monica Lewinsky and the Buffalo Bills have in common?
A: They both blew the big one several times.
Q: What was the first thing Monica saw in government?
A: The Executive Branch.
Q: What do Monica Lewinsky and soda pop machines have in common?
A: They both have slots which say "Insert Bill" here."
Q: What's the difference between Monica Lewinsky and the rest of us? A: In order for us to get some dick in the White House, we had to go out and vote.Q: How will history remember Bill Clinton? A: The President after Bush.Q: What's the difference between Bill Clinton and his dog Buddy? A: One tries to hump the leg of every woman in the White House, the other is a chocolate Lab.Q: What does Clinton say to interns as they leave his office? A: "Don't hit your head on the desk."Q: Did you hear about the Bill Clinton sale at clothing stores on President's day? A: All pants half off.Q: What do Monica Lewinsky and the Buffalo Bills have in common? A: They both blew the big one several times.Q: What was the first thing Monica saw in government? A: The Executive Branch.Q: What do Monica Lewinsky and soda pop machines have in common? A: They both have slots which say "Insert Bill" here."
What does Bill Clinton, Ken Starr, and Monica Lewinsky have in
common?
They blow.
Clinton blows the sax, Starr blows the whistle, and
Monica blows the skin flute.
Q: What's the difference between Monica Lewinsky and the rest of us? A: In order for us to get some dick in the White House, we had to go out and vote. Q: How will history remember Bill Clinton? A: The President after Bush. Q: What's the difference between Bill Clinton and his dog Buddy? A: One tries to hump the leg of every woman in the White House, the other is a chocolate Lab. Q: What does Clinton say to interns as they leave his office? A: "Don't hit your head on the desk." Q: Did you hear about the Bill Clinton sale at clothing stores on President's day? A: All pants half off. Q: What do Monica Lewinsky and the Buffalo Bills have in common? A: They both blew the big one several times. Q: What was the first thing Monica saw in government? A: The Executive Branch. Q: What do Monica Lewinsky and soda pop machines have in common? A: They both have slots which say "Insert Bill" here."