Muffin Jokes / Recent Jokes
There were twon muffins chilling in an oven. One muffin said to the other Ah! Were in an oven! The other muffin said, Holy Crap a talking muffin!!
How to catch a white elephant: Go to an place where there are white elephants. Bring with you a muffin (with raisins). Climb a tree. When the white elephant is close, drop the muffin (with raisins) in front of it. The white elephant will be happy, and eat the muffin (with raisins). White elephants like muffins (with raisins). Repeat this procedure for five days in a row. After the fifth day, the white elephant will be used to its daily muffin (with raisins). The sixth day you climb the tree, bringing with you a muffin (without raisins). Drop the muffin (without raisins) as usual. When the white elephant finds out that the muffin (without raisins) lacks rasins, it will darken in anger. And then you catch it the same way you catch an ordinary grey elephant.
The girls dad took her out to get a chocolate muffin!
"dad can hve me hair cut please??"
"ye sure hun lets go in here"
The girl goes in the hairdressers to get her hair cut with her dad.
Hairdresser: you betta watch tha muffin
little girl, you might get hairs
all over it!
girl: I know i am going to grow big boobs
too!
(Not for Muffin Man luvers)
Do you know the muffin man, the muffin man, the muffin man?
Do you know the muffin man who lives on Dreary lane?
I just shot the muffin man, the mufifn man, the muffin man.
I just shot the muffin man who lives on Dreary Lane.
I shot him with a 20 gauge, a 20 gauge, a 20 gauge
I shot him with a 20 gauge, and now he's dead.
A girl walks into a hair salon and she is eating a muffin and the man next to her says hunny your going to get hair on your muffin and the girl says so I'm going to get big boobies some day so what
Go to an place where there are white elephants. Bring with you a muffin (with raisins). Climb a tree. When the white elephant is close, drop the muffin (with raisins) in front of it. The white elephant will be happy, and eat the muffin (with raisins). White elephants like muffins (with raisins). Repeat this procedure for five days in a row.
After the fifth day, the white elephant will be used to its daily muffin (with rasins). The sixth day you climb the tree, bring with you a muffin without rasins. Drop the muffin as usual. When the white elephant finds out that the muffin lacks raisins, it will darken in anger.
And then you catch it the same way as an ordinary grey elephant.
Last year, a guy went to a doctor because he was losing weight.He found out he had a tapeworm, and was instructed by the doctor to bring a muffin, a Twinkie and a cookie with him on his next visit.When he was being examined the doctor shoved the muffin, the Twinkie, and finally the cookie up the guy's ass. The patient protested, but the doctor calmed him down, saying it was part of the therapy.This treatment continued for several weeks and every time the doctor shoved a muffin, a Twinkie and a cookie up his ass.Finally, after many visits, the Doctor instructed the patient to bring a muffin, a Twinkie and a mallet for the next visit. The day arrived and this time the doctor shoved only the muffin and the Twinkie up the patient's ass.After a few minutes the tapeworm appeared out of his asshole and demanded, "Where's my cookie!?" WHAM!!!