Mulla Jokes / Recent Jokes

Mulla Nasruddin walked into the office of a cemetery and complained to the manager: "I know well that my wife is buried here in your cemetery but I can't find her grave."

The manager checked in his register and asked, "What is her name?"

So Mulla said, "Mistress Mulla Nasruddin."
He looked again and he said, "There is no Mistress Mulla Nasruddin, but there is a Mulla Nasruddin." So he said, "We are sorry, it seems something has gone wrong in the register."

Nasruddin said, "Nothing is wrong. Where is the grave of Mulla Nasruddin? -- because everything is in my name." Even the grave of his wife!

Mulla Nasruddin has applied for a job. The manager looked at him and did not feel that he's even qualified to apply for it. He asked him, "Can you read and write?"

Mulla Nasruddin said, "I cannot read, but I can write."

The manager was surprised; this is a rare situation -- he could have never conceived of a man who cannot read but can write.

He said, "Then write!" He gave him a paper and Mulla immediately started writing on it. He went fast -- one page, two pages, three pages.

The manager said, "Now you stop! You please read what you have written, because I cannot read."

Nasruddin said, "That I have told you before -- I can only write! I can't read."

One night a neighbor found Nasrudin down on his knees looking for something under the street light.
"What have you lost, Mulla?"
"My key," said Nasrudin.
After a few minutes of searching, the other man said, "Where did you drop it?"
"By my house."
"Then why, for heaven's sake, are you looking here?"
"There is more light here."

One night a neighbor found Nasrudin down on his knees looking for something under the street light.
"What have you lost, Mulla?"
"My key," said Nasrudin.
After a few minutes of searching, the other man said, "Where did you drop it?"
"By my house."
"Then why, for heaven's sake, are you looking here?"
"There is more light here."

One day Mulla was invited to a meeting they asked him unexpectedly to make an speech. He did go on the tribune and asked; does any of you people know what I am going to talk about? People look at each others and said, No.
He then said, "than I never make speech for such an ignorance people" and left the meeting. Once he left people put their mind together and decided to invite Mulla for another time to come and make speech for them. At the same time they agreed that if Mulla ask them same question they all would say "yes".
For second time he came to the meeting and asked "does any of you knows what I am going to talk about? They all responded "yes" than he said if you already know then there is no need for my speech and he left.
This time people got realy pist off and they again decided to invite him for speech but this time they agreed to divide themselves and half of them say "Yes" and the other half say "NO" if more...

Moolla Do-Pyaza & his Bibi (wife), the Moollani, are returning home from the Durbar (congregation) of Caliph Akbar. On the road, Moollaji enters a public urinal. Soon thereafter Mukunda Deva Telinga, the Big Black Dravidian Subahdar of Telingana & Orissa, also enters. He greets the Moolla, stands next to him & they talk for a while as they relieve themselves. When Do-Pyaza comes out, the Moollani pesters him.

Moollani: What be the size of that Dravidian man's penis? Is it big and black like they say?
Moolla: I did not look.
Moollani: Really? I heard ye two talking all the while, so he must have been standing next to thee!
Moolla: Oh that is what thou meanest! Yes, I did see it. It is black, but we are both the same size. My penis is six oonglees (four and half inches) long, and so is his.
Moollani (doubtful): Really? If that be so, then swearest thou by the Quran!
Moolla: Well, if that be the case, then I mean his is six oonglees .... but more...

One day Nasrudin was walking along a deserted road. Night was
falling as he spied a troop of horsemen coming toward him. His
imagination began to work, and he feared that they might rob him,
or impress him into the army. So strong did this fear become that
he leaped over a wall and found himself in a graveyard. The other
travelers, innocent of any such motive as had been assumed by
Nasrudin, became curious and pursued him.
When they came upon him lying motionaless, one said, "Can we help
you? And, why are you here in this position?"
Nasrudin, realizing his mistake said, "It is more complicated
than you assume. You see, I am here because of you; and you, you
are here because of me."
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EVEN THE INNOCENCE HAVE GUILT
One day he disagreed with the prior of a monastery at which he
was staying. Shortly afterward, a bag of rice was missing. more...