Navy Jokes / Recent Jokes
Q: Why do they use powdered soap in the navy?
A: Because it takes longer to pick up.
Do you know why the new [ethnic] navy is buying glass-bottomed boats for their
new fleet?
So they can see the old [ethnic] navy.
An officer in the U.S. Naval reserve was attending a conference that included admirals from both the U.S. Navy and the French Navy. At a cocktail reception, he found himself in a small group that included personnel from both navies.The French admiral started complaining that whereas Europeans learned many languages, Americans learned only English. He then asked: "Why is it that we have to speak English in these conferences rather than you speak French?Without hesitating, the American Admiral replied: "Maybe it's because the Brits, Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so you would not have to speak German."The group became silent.
A soldier, a marine, and an airman got into a fight about which service is best. The fight was so heated, that they killed each other.Soon, they found themselves in Heaven. They see St. Peter walk by and ask, “Which
Branch of Service is the best?”St. Peter replied, “I can't answer that. But, I will ask God what He thinks the next time I see Him.”Some time later, the three see St. Peter again and ask him if he was able to find the
answer.Suddenly, a dove landed on St. Peter's shoulder. The dove was carrying a note in
its beak. St. Peter opened the note and read it out loud to the three fellows:
“Gentlemen: All the Branches of the Service are ‘Honorable and Noble’. Each one
of you has served your country well. Be proud of that.(signed)
GOD, USN (Ret.)”
Why does the Iraqi navy have glass bottom boats? So they can see their air force.
The old Navy Chief finally retired and got that chicken ranch he always wanted. He took
with him his life-long pet parrot.
First morning at 0430, the parrot squawked loudly and said, “Reveille, Reveille. Up all
hands. Heave out and trice up. The smoking lamp is lighted, now Reveille. ”
The old chief told the parrot, “We are no longer in the Navy. Go back to sleep. ”
The next morning, the parrot did the same thing. Chief told the parrot, “If you keep this up, I'll put you out in the chicken pen. ”
Again the parrot did it, and true to his word, the Chief put the parrot in the chicken pen.
About 0630 the next morning, the Chief was awakened by one heck of a ruckus in the chicken pen. He went out to see what was the matter. The parrot had about 40 white chickens at attention in formation, and on the ground laid 3 bruised and beaten brown chickens. The parrot was saying, “By God, when I say fall out in dress whites, I don't
mean Khakis! more...