Nightclub Jokes

So this guy wants to go into a nightclub, but the bouncer says -
"Sorry, bud, you need a tie for this place."

Our Hero goes back to his car and rummages around, but there's no necktie to be found.

Finally, in desperation, he takes his jumper cables, wraps them around his neck, ties a nice knot, and lets the ends dangle free.

He goes back to the nightclub, where the bouncer says...
"Well, OK, I guess you can come in. But don't start anything!"

A guy meets a girl out at a nightclub and she invites him back to her place for the night. Her parents are out of town and this is the perfect opportunity. They get back to her house and they go into her bedroom. When the guy walks in the door, he notices all these fluffy toys. There's hundreds of them, fluffy toys on top of the wardrobe, fluffy toys on the bookshelf and window sill, there's more on the floor, and of course fluffy toys all over the bed. Later after they've had sex, he turns to her and asks "So, how was I?" She says "Well... you can take anything from the bottom shelf."

A manager brings a dog into a nightclub to work. The dog is a brilliant piano player. He plays all the standards. He's sitting there, pounding out the tunes, when all of a sudden; a big dog comes in and drags him out.

The nightclub owner asks, "What happened?"

The manager says, "That's his mother. She wants him to be a doctor."

So this guy wants to go into a nightclub, but the bouncer says -
"Sorry, bud, you need a tie for this place."
Our Hero goes back to his car and rummages around, but there's no necktie to be found.
Finally, in desperation, he takes his jumper cables, wraps them around his neck, ties a nice knot, and lets the ends dangle free.
He goes back to the nightclub, where the bouncer says...
"Well, OK, I guess you can come in. But don't start anything!"

So this guy wants to go into a nightclub, but the bouncer says -"Sorry, bud, you need a tie for this place."Our Hero goes back to his car and rummages around, but there's no necktie to be found.Finally, in desperation, he takes his jumper cables, wraps them around his neck, ties a nice knot, and lets the ends dangle free.He goes back to the nightclub, where the bouncer says..."Well, OK, I guess you can come in. But don't start anything!"