Oxford Jokes / Recent Jokes

An American was visiting Oxford University for the first time, and stopped a passing Oxford don to ask a question.

"Excuse me," said the American, "can you tell me if that's Trinity College I'm looking at?

"You are probably unaware" sneered the don, "that you have just ended your sentence with a preposition. You may wish to rephrase your question."

The American began again: "Can you tell me if that's Trinity College I'm looking at, YOU JERK!"

The radio show was Queensland FM (QFM) and the host was Jim.
The phone-in competition was to give an English word that's not in the Oxford Dictionary and put the word in a sentence. The first prize was a fortnight for two in Los Angeles.
The show went as follows (don't forget the Aussie accent):
Jim: 'Hi, this is Jim. What's your name and what's your word'
Caller: 'This is Bob from the bush and my word is gaan, spelt g. a. a. n. '
Jim: 'Thanks Bob, my assistants are just checking and they are telling me that the word does not appear in the oxford Dictionary, so for two weeks in Los Angeles, please put your word into a sentence.'
Bob from the bush: 'Gaan f*** yourself!'
Jim immediately breaks the call and puts out the following message: 'Ladies and gents, this is a family show and we would appreciate that any future contestants refrain from using such language.'
Forty-five minutes and many unsuccessful contestants later...
Jim: 'Hi, this is Jim at more...

The rowing crew
Yeshiva University in Golders Green decided to put together a rowing team.
Unfortunately, they lost race after race. They practised for hours every day, but never managed to come in any better than dead last. The Head of the Yeshiva finally decided he couldn`t stand any more embarrassment so he sent Yankel to spy on the Oxford University team.
So Yankel shlepped off to Oxford and hid in the bullrushes off the river from where he carefully watched the Oxford team as they practised.
Yankel finally returned to the Yeshiva.
"I have figured out their secret," he announced.
"They have eight guys rowing and only one guy shouting."

What did Clinton say when accused of copying his homework from hisgirlfriend at Oxford? I did not have textual relations with that woman.