Plastic Jokes / Recent Jokes

1. Ride mechanical horses with coins fished out of the reflecting pond. 2. Try pants on backwards at the Gap. Ask the salesperson if they make your butt look big. 3. Dial 900 numbers from demonstration phones in Radio Shack. 4. Sneeze on the sample tray at Hickory Farms and helpfully volunteer to consume its now unwanted contents. 5. At the bottom of an escalator, scream 'MY SHOELACES! AAAGH!' 6. Ask the sales personnel at the music store whether inflated CD prices are in pesos or rubles. 7. Teach pet store parrots new vocabulary that makes them unsalable. 8. Stomp on ketchup packets at Burger King.. 9. ..but save a few to slurp on as snacks. Tell people that they're 'astronaut food'. 10. Follow patrons of B. Dalton's around while reading aloud from 'Dianetics.' 11. Ask mall cops for stories of World War I. 12. Ask a salesman why a particular TV is labeled black and white and insist that it's a color set. When he disagrees, give him a strange look and say, 'You mean you really can't more...

A groom buys the engagement ring at a jewelry store. As the groom enters the room, we "have been talking about" the news that says the jewelry store he just went to is being investigated for selling plastic diamonds to unknowledgeable customers. This didn't work too well but maybe if you have better actors in your group it would.

Cheap plastic rings
A groom buys the engagement ring at a jewelry store. As the groom enters the room, we "have been talking about" the news that says the jewelry store he just went to is being investigated for selling plastic diamonds to unknowledgeable customers. This didn`t work too well but maybe if you have better actors in your group it would.
I`ll just call my lawyer about this
Another on that I have seen pulled is to have someone speak out at the time the minister asks, "If anyone has good reason why these two should not be married, speak now or forever hold your peace."
They had a pregnant lady stand up and say, "Oh, never mind! I`ll just call my lawyer!" It rattled the groom`s mother so much that she fainted.
A secret pregnant lover
At the rehearsal dinner for my boss` daughter and son-in-law-to-be, a loud eight-months pregnant teenage girl suddenly appeared at the back of the room screaming ten minutes worth of more...

A groom buys the engagement ring at a jewelry store. As the groom enters the room, we "have been talking about" the news that says the jewelry store he just went to is being investigated for selling plastic diamonds to unknowledgeable customers. This didn`t work too well but maybe if you have better actors in your group it would.

A big-time executive walked into a bar and sat down next to a drunk who was
studying, something in his hand. The executive leaned close as the drunk held
the object up to the light. "Well, it looks like plastic," the drunk said. Then
he rolled it around in his fingers and added, "And it feels like rubber."
Curious, the executive asked, "What do you have there?"
The drunk shook his head, "Damned if I know. It looks like plastic and feels
like rubber."
The executive said, "Let me take a look." He examined it, rolled it between his
fingers and said, "Yeah, you're right. It does look like plastic and feels like
rubber, but I don't know what it is. Where did you get it?"
The drunk replied, "Out of my nose."

Cheap plastic rings
A groom buys the engagement ring at a jewelry store. As the groom enters the room, we "have been talking about" the news that says the jewelry store he just went to is being investigated for selling plastic diamonds to unknowledgeable customers. This didn't work too well but maybe if you have better actors in your group it would.

Here is an electronic gadget that much prized by Japanese women. Many regard the Pucki Pucki noise an antidote to stress.
Bubble-wrap, Pucki Pucki, Poppety-Pop, call it what you will, bursting these bubbles provides harmless pleasure for office workers.& Japan has seen a craze for an electronic toy that recreates the thrill of squeezing the plastic packaging material. Bandai sell them for about $10, for that you get a gizmo, battery and a pack of 10 bubble wraps.
`Eternal Poppety-Pop` fits on a keyring and the electronic gizmo makes an endless supply of plastic bubbles.& Will and Guy are astonished to learn that three million of the Eternal Poppety-Pop gadgets have been sold in Japan.&
Other gadgets include scented bubble wrap, heart-shaped bubble wrap and high-pressure bubble wrap, designed to produce an extra loud pop when its bubbles are burst.&
The parent company Bandai is not sitting back on its laurels, but trying to generate the next craze.& They are more...