Popcorn Jokes / Recent Jokes

President Ronald Regan told this joke about Fidel Castro:Castro was addressing a large audience in Cuba, and he began, "They accuse me of intervening in Angola..." and a man going through the audience called out, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"Castro went on: "They say I'm intervening in Mozambique..." and the same loud voice shouted, "Peanuts! Popcorn! Castro continued: "They say I'm intervening in Nicaragua..." and the voice yelled again, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"By this time Castro was boiling mad and he sputtered, "Bring that man who is shouting 'Peanuts! Popcorn!' to me, and I'll kick him all the way to Miami."And everybody in the audience started shouting, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"

Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
No, they eat the fingers separately...

Castro was addressing a large audience in Cuba, and he began, "They accuse me of intervening in Angola..." and a man going through the audience called out, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"
Castro went on: "They say I'm intervening in Mozambique..." and the same loud voice shouted, "Peanuts! Popcorn!
Castro continued: "They say I'm intervening in Nicaragua..." and the voice yelled again, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"
By this time Castro was boiling mad and he sputtered, "Bring that man who is shouting' Peanuts! Popcorn!' to me, and I'll kick him all the way to Miami."
And everybody in the audience started shouting, "Peanuts! Popcorn!"

Q: How many men does it take to make popcorn?

A. Four, one to hold the pot, and three to act macho and shake the stove.Q. How do you save a man from drowning?

A. Take your foot off of his head.Q. How are men like parking spaces?

A. The good ones are always taken and all that is left are handicapped

My mother was a fanatic about public toilets. As a little girl, she'd bring me in the stall, teach me to wad up toilet paper and wipe the seat. Then, she'd carefully lay strips of toilet paper to cover the seat. Finally, she'd instruct, "Never, never sit on a public toilet seat." And she'd demonstrate"The Stance," which consisted of balancing over the toilet in a sitting position without actually letting any of your flesh make contact with the toilet seat. But by this time, I'd have peed down my leg. And we'd go home. That was a long time ago. I've had lots of experience with public toilets since then, but I'm still not particularly fond of public toilets, especially those with powerful, red-eye sensors. Those toilets know when you want them to flush. They are psychic toilets. But I always confuse their psychic ability by following my mother's advice and assuming The Stance. The Stance is excruciatingly difficult to maintain when one's bladder is especially full. more...

Great Chicken Recipe:
When I found this recipe I thought it was perfect for those who just are not sure how to tell when poultry is cooked thoroughly but not dried out. Give this a try.
Baked Stuffed Chicken
2-3 kg chicken
1 cup melted butter
1 cup stuffing
1 cup uncooked popcorn
salt & pepper to taste
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Brush chicken well with melted butter, salt and pepper.
Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn.
Place in baking pan in the oven.
Listen for the popping sounds.

Why are men like popcorn?
They satisfy you, but only for a little while.