Prostitute Jokes / Recent Jokes

This male prostitute contracted leprosy. He did okay for a while, but then his business dropped off.

Q. How are a lawyer and a prostitute different?
A. The prostitute stops fucking you after you're dead.

A man is sitting at a bar and sees this beautiful woman on the arm of some drunk. He talks with the bartender and finds out that she is a prostitute.

He walks over to her and says " Is it true that your a prostitute?"

She replies "Yeah what can I do for you big boy?"

He thinks a second and finally asks her what she charges. She replies "$100 for a hand job."

"Are you crazy?" he responds.

She walks the man over to the window, "see that Ferrari out there? I own that car. Trust me you wont leave unsatisfied." So he takes her to his apartment, gives her the money and they get down to business.

The next day he sees her at the bar again. He walks over to her and says, "Last night was great."

"You think that was great," she replies" wait tell you have one of my blow jobs."

"How much?" the man asks more...

Q: What did Jimmy Swaggart pay for his prostitute and her four blonde friends?
A: Regular price, four bucks, four bucks, four bucks, four bucks.

This gay fellow was walking down the street, when he came across a huge guy with a hiry chest. He went up to the guy and said "Excuse me sir, uh do you mind if i ask how you got such a lovely chest? "It's easy" the bloke replied, "you just rub vasoline on it every night before you go to bed" So the gay fellow ran home to his boy friend and told him all about it, and the boyfriend replied "That can't be right, or you would have a pony tail growing out of your ass by now" ******************* A man walked into a bar, and he got very drunk He shouted out so that everyone could hear him, "all lawyers are arse holes!" Then a person shouted back saying that he resented what the drunken man had said. Th drunk man said, "why? Are you a lawyer". No the man replied, I'm an arse hole. ******************** One day they were three suicidal prostitute, they wanted to kill themselves so they decided to jump of a 50 story building. The first more...

Clinton is out jogging around in some of the seedier areas of Washington D.C. He
notices a good looking prostitute. She sees this and calls out, "Fifty dollars!"
He is tempted, but the price is a little high. So he calls back, "Five!"
She is disappointed and turns away, and Bill continues his jog.
A few days later, he finds himself jogging in the same area and as luck would
have it, the prostitute is still there. But she doesn't want to come down on her
price. "Fifty!" she shouts.
Bill answers, "Five!" No sale.
About a week later, Hillary has decided that she wants to get in shape, so she
demands to go jogging with Bill. They get to the seedy part of town and the same
prostitute is still there. She eyes Bill and Hillary together and yells, "See
what you get for five dollars!"

Clinton is out jogging around in some of the seedier areas of Washington D.C. He notices a good looking prostitute. She sees this and calls out: "Fifty dollars!" He is tempted, but the price is a little high. So he calls back: "Five!" She is disappointed and turns away and Bill continues his jog.
A few days later, he finds himself jogging in the same area and as luck would have it, the prostitute is still there. But she want not come down on her price. "Fifty!" she shouts and Bill answers her: "Five!" No sale.
About a week later, Hillary has decided that she wants to get into shape so she demands to go jogging with Bill. They get to the seedy part of town and the same prostitute is still there. She eyes Bill and Hillary together and yells: "See what you get for five dollars!"