Puppy Jokes / Recent Jokes
There was once a puppy called May who loved to pick quarrels with animals who were bigger than she was. One day she argued with a lion. The next day was the first of June. Why? Because that was the end of May!
Q: What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy? A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up.
The pub landlord was delighted with the little puppy that he'd acquired, and the little puppy was very pleased with his new home.
He'd run around the place, just a bundle of energy - very inquisitive, examining this, looking into that, non-stop all day, until the inevitable happened and he caught his tail in a fast-closing door and lost it!
Time passed, and as one human year equals seven dog years, eventually he went to dog-heaven, for an endless supply of dog biscuits, walks in paradise - well, you couldn't call it a dog's life!
However, he felt incomplete, and one night around midnight, he went back in his ghostly form to ask to be made whole again.
"Sorry," said the landlord, "you know very well I can't retail spirits after hours."
What is a collie puppy's favorite toy? A chew-chew train!
What's the difference between a surgeon and a puppy? If you put a puppy in a room by itself for an hour, it'll probably stop whining.
Q: What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy?
A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up.
Q: What is the difference between a puppy and Al Gore?
A: After five weeks, a puppy opens the eyes and stops whining.