Pussy Jokes / Recent Jokes

An old mouse chanced to see a cat wearing a few beads round her neck. "Ah," said the mouse with joy, "that cat has turned vegetarian." Thereupon, he brought his offspring along to pay a call on the cat to express their gratitude. No sooner had they appeared than the cat gave a deep howl and devoured several mice in rapid succession. The old mouse turned tail in the nick of time and made good his escape. Sticking out his tongue, he cried: "My, my! That pussy is even more ferocious after turning vegetarian."

A man walks into the bar with his wife. After a few drinks, he goes and uses the pisser. as soon as he wlked in their, a man walked up and said to her,
"man babby you got some nice tits i want to suck on them"
the women looking horified looked at him and said
"are you talking to me"? The man then said
"man babby you got a nice ass, i want to lick that shit".
the women says
"my husband is in the bathroom and he is going to kick your ass".
the man says
"man babby you got a nice pussy i want to tip you over and drink beer from that shit"
The women gets up ready to slap the man. as soon as he sees her husband walking up the man takes off. Her husband asks,
"whats wrong hunny"?
the women replies,
"Youll never believe it, this man just came up and said that he wanted to suck on my titties"
The man looks around and says,
"where is this guy"
The women more...

A man walks into the bar with his wife. After a few drinks, he goes and uses the pisser. as soon as he wlked in their, a man walked up and said to her,
"man babby you got some nice tits i want tosuck on them"
the women looking horified looked at him and said
"are you talking to me"? The man then said
"man babby you got a nice ass, i want to lick that shit".
the women says
"my husband is in the bathroom and he is going to kick your ass".
the man says
"man babby you got a nice pussy i want to tip you over and drink beer from that shit"
The women gets up ready to slap the man. as soon as he sees her husband walking up the man takes off. Her husband asks,
"whats wrong hunny"?
the women replies,
"Youll never believe it, this man just came up and said that he wanted to suck on my titties"
The man looks around and says,
"where is this guy"
The women more...

A man is sitting on a train across from a busty blonde wearing a tiny mini skirt. Despite his efforts, he is unable to stop staring at the top of her thighs. To his delight, he realizes she has gone without underwear. The blonde realizes he is staring and inquires, "Are you looking at my puss?"
"Yes, I'm sorry," replies the man and promises to avert his eyes. "It's quite alright," replies the woman, "It's very talented, watch this, I'll make it blow a kiss to you." Sure enough the pussy blows him a kiss. The man, who is completely absorbed, inquires what else the wonder pussy can do. "I can also make it wink," says the woman. The man stares in amazement as the pussy winks at him. "Come and sit next to me," suggests the woman, patting the seat. The man moves over and is asked, "Would you like to stick a couple of fingers in?"
Stunned, the man replies, "Good grief! Can it whistle too?!"

one day a guy named pussy walked in the house and said hi to his wife dick head. he asked dick head if she wanted to get it going on but she said no because she had to go to an apointment.
When she got there the doctor asked dick head if she had balls to go with her dick she said yes!!!
So then the guy had an apointment and the doctor asked if he had boobs to go with his pussy. and he said yes.
So later that night Pussy and dick head had sex and dick head asked pussy what happened to your boobs and he said I was having sex with a bartender and a dog came and ripped off my boobs!!!

Q: What's the difference between pussy and apple pie?
A: You can eat your Mom's apple pie.

The official list of types of pussy found throughout the land.
1. Expensive pussy: Most pussy falls into this definition. Expensive pussy can be recognized by the following - fur coats, $500 dresses, spandex, bright colored shorts, and shirts with greek letters on them. 98% of the pussy found on the USC campus falls into this category.
Advantages: If you can afford it, it will be great.
Disadvantages: Many, mostly in the form of checking account depletion. Often not worth it.
2. Cheap pussy: Very rare. Usually comes in the form of a girlfriend of yours who will not go away no matter what you do. Cheap pussy can be recognized by the following - she will often pay for dinner, understands when you are broke, calls every day, wants it constantly, easily hurt, but shakes it off.
Advantages: Inexpensive, guaranteed, loving, will try anything once and sometimes twice. You're lucky if you find this.
Disadvantages: Won't go away, possessive, bugs you all the time, can more...