Rolls Jokes / Recent Jokes

A man is in bed with his wife when there is a knock on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock - it's half-past three in the morning."I'm not getting out of bed at this time", he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows. "Aren't you going to answer that?" says his wife. So, he drags himself out of bed and goes downstairs. He opens the door and there is man standing at the door. It didn't take the homeowner long to realize the man was drunk. "Hi there," slurs the stranger, "Can you give me a push?""No. Get lost, it's half past three. I was in bed," says the man and slams the door.He goes back up to bed and tells his wife what happened and she says "Dave, that wasn't very nice of you.Remember that night we broke down in the pouring rain on the way to pick the kids up fromthe baby-sitter and you had to knock on that man's door to get us started again? Whatwould have happened if he'd told us to get more...

A man walks into a hotel and asks for a room. The guy behind the counter tells him that there is one room left but it is haunted. The man gets the room anyway. That night he hears in a soft voice "If the log rolls over we'll all die!" He runs away. The next day a father and his daughter get the room after they were told that it is haunted. That night they hear "If the log rolls over we'll all die!" The girl hides under the bed as the father follows the sound to the bathroom door. He opens the door. There on the ground is a bunch of ants staring at a turd saying, "If the log rolls over, we'll all die!"

A guy driving a Yugo pulls up at a stoplight next to a Rolls-Royce. The driver of the Yugo rolls down his window and shouts to the driver of the Rolls, "Hey, buddy, that's a nice car. You got a phone in your Rolls? I've got one in my Yugo!"The driver of Rolls looks over and says simply, "Yes I have a phone."The driver of the Yugo says, "Cool! Hey, you got a fridge in there too? I've got a fridge in the back seat of my Yugo!"The driver of the Rolls, looking annoyed, says, "Yes, I have a refrigerator."The driver of the Yugo says, "That's great, man! Hey, you got a TV in there, too? You know, I got a TV in the back seat of my Yugo!"The driver of the Rolls, looking very annoyed by now, says, "Of course I have a television. A Rolls-Royce is the finest luxury car in the world!"The driver of the Yugo says, "Very cool car! Hey, you got a bed in there, too? I got a bed in the back of my Yugo!"Upset that he did not have a more...

On the first day of Christmas,
My good friend sent to me,
A gecko in a flame tree.

On the second day of Christmas,
My true friend gave to me,
Two tape recorders.
And a gecko in a flame tree.
On the third day of Christmas,
My true friend gave to me,
Three air conditioners.
Two tape recorders.
And a gecko in a flame tree.

On the forth day of Christmas
My true friend gave to me,
Four rolls of plastic.
Three air conditioners.
Two tape recorders.
And a gecko in a flame tree.

On the fifth day of Christmas.
My true friend gave to me,
Five princess rings.
Four rolls of plastic.
Three air conditioners.
Two tape recorders.
And a gecko in a flame tree.

On the sixth day of Christmas
My true friend gave to me,
Six days in Hong Kong.
Five princess rings.
Four rolls of plastic.
Three air conditioners.
Two tape more...

A man walks into the bar with his wife. After a few drinks, he goes and uses the pisser. as soon as he wlked in their, a man walked up and said to her,
"man babby you got some nice tits i want to suck on them"
the women looking horified looked at him and said
"are you talking to me"? The man then said
"man babby you got a nice ass, i want to lick that shit".
the women says
"my husband is in the bathroom and he is going to kick your ass".
the man says
"man babby you got a nice pussy i want to tip you over and drink beer from that shit"
The women gets up ready to slap the man. as soon as he sees her husband walking up the man takes off. Her husband asks,
"whats wrong hunny"?
the women replies,
"Youll never believe it, this man just came up and said that he wanted to suck on my titties"
The man looks around and says,
"where is this guy"
The women more...

A man walks into the bar with his wife. After a few drinks, he goes and uses the pisser. as soon as he wlked in their, a man walked up and said to her,
"man babby you got some nice tits i want tosuck on them"
the women looking horified looked at him and said
"are you talking to me"? The man then said
"man babby you got a nice ass, i want to lick that shit".
the women says
"my husband is in the bathroom and he is going to kick your ass".
the man says
"man babby you got a nice pussy i want to tip you over and drink beer from that shit"
The women gets up ready to slap the man. as soon as he sees her husband walking up the man takes off. Her husband asks,
"whats wrong hunny"?
the women replies,
"Youll never believe it, this man just came up and said that he wanted to suck on my titties"
The man looks around and says,
"where is this guy"
The women more...

A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tat-tat on the door.He rolls over and looks at his clock, and it's half past three in the morning."I'm not getting out of bed at this time," he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows. "Aren't you going to answer that?" sayshis wife. So he drags himself out of bed, and goes downstairs. He opensthe door and there is man standing at the door. It didn't take thehomeowner long to realize the man was drunk."Hi there." slurs the stranger, "Can you give me a push??" "No, getlost, it's half past three. I was in bed." says the man and slams thedoor.He goes back up to bed and tells his wife what happened and she says "Dave, that wasn't very nice of you. Remember that night we broke downin the pouring rain on the way to pick the kids up from the baby-sitterand you had to knock on that man's house to get us started again? Whatwould have happened if he'd told us to get more...