Scottish Jokes / Recent Jokes
Ther was 3 men
an English Man
an Irish Man
and a Scottish man
and they was all in the desert and they found a lamp
the geni said you can have 1 wish each before you die so
the Irish Man wished for a pint of Guiness
the scottish man wish for bag-pipes
and ther English wished for a car door
and undun the window and said better open a window its
Hot In Here
Why do so many Scottish people have double glazing on their windows?
To stop there children from hearing the ice cream van!
There once were 2 scottish guys and 1 said to the other.
guy #1:wat would u do if u were the last man on earth?
guy #2:i would shag everything that moved, wat would u do?
guy #1:i would stay perfectly still.
A Scotsman wanted to impress his girlfriend so he took her for a ride in a taxi. The trouble was, she was so beautiful he could hardly keep his eyes on the meter.
Why do pipers like to march as they play the bagpipes? A moving target is harder to hit.
Did you hear about the Scottish kamikaze pilot? He crashed his plane in his brother`s scrapyard.
Why do bagpipers walk when they play? They`re trying to get away from the noise.