Screaming Jokes / Recent Jokes

It was Saturday morning and Jake, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage. Jake asks her, "What are you up to?" Alice smiles, "I'm going hunting with you!" Jake, though he has many reservations, reluctantly decides to take her along. They arrive at the hunting site. Jake sets his wife safely up in the tree stand and tells her: "If you see a deer, take careful aim on it and I'll come running back as soon as I hear the shot." Jake walks away with a smile on his face knowing that Alice couldn't bag an elephant - much less a deer. But not 10 minutes pass when he is startled as he hears an array of gunshots. Quickly, Jake starts running back. As Jake gets closer to her stand, he hears Alice screaming, "Get away from my deer!" Confused, Jake races faster towards his screaming wife. more...

It was Saturday morning as Jake, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walked down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he found his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage.
Jake asked her, "What are you up to?"
Alice smiled. "I'm going hunting with you!"
Jake, though he had many reservations about this, reluctantly decided to take her along. Later they arrived at the hunting site. Jake set his wife safely up in the tree stand and told her, "If you see a deer, take careful aim and I'll come running back as soon as I hear the shot."
Jake walked away with a smile on his face knowing that Alice couldn't bag an elephant, much less a deer. Not 10 minutes passed when he was startled as he heard an array of gunshots.
Quickly, Jake ran back. As Jake got closer to her stand, he heard Alice screaming: "Get away from my deer!"
Confused, Jake raced faster more...

It was Saturday morning as Jake, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walked down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he found his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage.Jake asked her, "What are you up to?"Alice smiled. "I'm going hunting with you!"Jake, though he had many reservations about this, reluctantly decided to take her along. Later they arrived at the hunting site. Jake set his wife safely up in the tree stand and told her, "If you see a deer, take careful aim and I'll come running back as soon as I hear the shot."Jake walked away with a smile on his face knowing that Alice couldn't bag an elephant, much less a deer. Not 10 minutes passed when he was startled as he heard an array of gunshots.Quickly, Jake ran back. As Jake got closer to her stand, he heard Alice screaming: "Get away from my deer!"Confused, Jake raced faster towards his screaming wife. And more...

It was Saturday morning as Steve, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage.
Steve asks her: "What are you up to?"
Alice smiles: "I'm going hunting with you!"
Steve, though he had many reservations about this, reluctantly decides to take her along. Later they arrive at the hunting site. Steve sets his wife safely up in the tree stand and tells her: "If you see a deer, take careful aim on it and I'll come running back as soon as I hear the shot"
Steve walks away with a smile on his face knowing that Alice couldn't bag an elephant-much less a deer. Not 10 minutes pass when he is startled as he hears an array of gunshots.
Quickly, Steve starts running back. As he gets closer to her stand, he hears Alice screaming: "Get away from my deer!"
Confused, Steve more...

Once there were three teenagers, two boys and one girl. The teenagers wanted to stay in a hotel, so they drove to the nearest one. The hotel owner said, "We only have one more free room, but it is the haunted one." The teenagers didn't care, so they said they'd take it anyway. "It's on the 4th floor." the owner said. Once the teenagers had gotten to the 4th floor, they heard a sound coming from inside of the room. The oldest boy said he'd go in first to see what the sound was. He went inside and heard a high-pitched voice saying, "When the log rolls over, we'll all be dead!" The teenager ran through the window screaming and died. Then the second oldest boy went into the room and heard, "When the log rolls over, we'll all be dead!" He too ran out the window screaming and died. Then it was the girls turn. Even though she was the youngest of the three teenagers, she was the bravest. She too heard, "When the log rolls over, we'll all be more...

A drunk is sitting at the bar and asks the bartender where the bathroom is. "Down the hall and make a left," the bartender tells him.
The drunk heads to bathroom. A few minutes later, everyone at the bar hears a loud scream and wonders what's going on in the bathroom. A few more minutes go by and everyone at the bar hears another loud scream that seems to be coming from the bathroom.
This time, the bartender decides he'd better go to the bathroom and investigate what the drunk is screaming about.
He opens the door and asks the drunk, "What is all the screaming about. You're scaring all my customers away. What's going on?"
"Hey, it's not my fault," mumbles the drunk. "I'm sitting on the toilet and every time I go to flush it, something comes up and squeezes the hell out of my balls!"
With that, the bartender opens the door, looks in, and says, "No wonder, you fool, you're sitting on a mop bucket!"

Queen Elizabeth, Bush & Musharraf died & went straight to hell. Queen Elizabeth said "I miss England, I want to call England and see how everybody is doing there. She called and talked for about 5 minutes, then she asked "Well, devil how much do I owe you????

The devil says "Five million dollars". .

She wrote him a cheque and went to sit back on her chair. Bush was soo jealous, he starts screaming, "My turn! I wanna call the United States, I want to see how everybody is doing there too" He called and talked for about 2 minutes, then he asked "Well, devil how much do I owe you????

The devil says "Ten million dollars" With a smug look on his face, he made a cheque and went to sit back on his chair. Musharraf was even more jealous & starts screaming, "I want to call Pakistan too, I wanna talk to the ministers, to the deputy, I wanna talk to everybody of my Parliment"..... He called
Pakistan and more...