Shame Jokes

Every day, we are assaulted by stories of stupid people-many of whom use their stupidity for personal gain. From time to time, though, we hear of those who strive to achieve new levels of stupidity *while* also breaking the law. To these brave men and women-ooops, "women and men"-we
present the highest possible honor: entry into the "Stupid-Criminal Hall of Shame."
Following are their accounts...
Kentucky (where else?): Two men tried to pull the front off a cash machine by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck. Instead of pulling the front panel off the machine, though, they pulled the bumper off their truck. Scared, they left the scene and drove home. With the chain still attached to the machine. With their bumper still attached to the chain. With their vehicle's license plate still attached to the bumper.
South Carolina: A man walked into a local police station, dropped a bag of cocaine on the counter, informed the more...

SHARING A DONKEY
An old man, a boy and a donkey were going to town. The boy rode on the
donkey and the old man walked. As they went along they passed some people
who remarked it was a shame the old man was walking and the boy was
riding. The man and boy thought maybe the critics were right, so they
changed positions.
Later, they passed some people who remarked, "What a shame, he makes that
little boy walk." They then decided they both would walk!
Soon they passed some more people who thought they were stupid to walk
when they had a decent donkey to ride. So, they both rode the donkey.
Now they passed some people who shamed them by saying how awful to put
such a load on a poor donkey. The boy and man said they were probably
right, so they decided to carry the donkey.
As they crossed the bridge, they lost their grip on the animal and he fell
into the river and drowned.
The moral of the story; "If you try to more...

What’s the difference between a shame and a pity?

If a busload of lawyers goes over a cliff, and there are no survivors, that’s known as a pity. If there were any empty seats, that’s a shame.

There was an old man, a boy, and a donkey. They were going to town and it was decided that the boy should ride. As they went along they passed some people who thought that it was a shame for the boy to ride and the old man to walk. The old man and boy decided that maybe the critics were right, so they changed positions. Later, they passed some more people who thought that it was a real shame for that man to make such a small boy walk. The two decided that maybe they both should walk. Soon they passed some more people who thought that it was stupid to walk when they had a donkey to ride. The man and the boy decided maybe the critics were right so, they decided that they both should ride. They soon passed other people who thought that it was a shame to put such a load on a poor little animal. The old man and the boy decided that maybe the critics were right, so they decided to carry the donkey. As they crossed a bridge they lost their grip on the animal and he fell into the river and more...

Q: How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
A: Cut the rope.

Q: Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?
A: Take your foot off his head.

Q: Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?
A: No? Good!

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of pond scum?
A: The bucket.

Q: What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?
A: When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.

Q: What is the definition of a "crying shame"?
A: There was an empty seat.

Q. Where can you find a good lawyer?
A. In the cemetary.