Shopkeeper Jokes / Recent Jokes
The shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST DEALS.
He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST PRICES.
The shopkeeper was panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop - it read... MAIN ENTRANCE.
The shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read:
BEST DEALS.
He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading:
LOWEST PRICES.
The shopkeeper was panicked, until he got an idea.
He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop... It read:
MAIN ENTRANCE.
One Day A Lady Goes To A Shopkeeper Looking Furious And Carrying A Pouch In Her Hand
Shopkeeper: Madam! What Happened Madam Why Do You Look So Furious?
Lady: I Bought This Toy From You Yesterday And You Said It Was Unbreakable.
Shopkeeper:(Checks The Toy)
Madam I Don't Think I Have Lied The Toy Is All Right.
Lady: Ya! I Now You Are True But My Son Monu Broke All His Other Toys Using This Unbreakable Toy
A Sardar walked into a household appliances store. The owner was busy tallying his accounts and his eyes were glued to his ledgers. The Sardar asked the owner "I want that VCR." Without taking the eyes off the ledgers, the owner replied, "No, Sardar, that is not for you."
Our Sardar felt insulted. He thought that the shopkeeper was biased against Sardars. Next day, he arrived at the shop clean shaven and without his headgear. He asked for the same VCR. The owner, who was again busy tallying his accounts replied without raising his head, "No, Sardar, that is not for you."
The Sardar was perplexed. How could the shopkeeper guess correctly that he was a Sardar? So, the next day, the Sardar went to the same shop disguised as a woman, in churidar and pyjama, head covered with dupatta, and asked for the same VCR. The shopkeeper again replied without raising his head - "No, Sardar, that is not for you!"
Puzzled, the Sardar asked the more...
After many years of marriage, a husband has turned into a couch potato, became completely inattentive to his wife and sat guzzling beer and watching TV all day. The wife was dismayed because no matter what she did to attract the husband’s attention, he’d just shrug her off with some bored comment.
This went on for many months and the wife was going crazy with boredom. Then one day at a pet store, the wife saw this big, ugly, snorting bird with a hairy chest, powerful hairy forearms, beady eyes and dribble running down the side of its mouth.
The shopkeeper, observing her fascination with the bird, told her it was a special imported “Goony bird” and it had a very peculiar trait. To demonstrate, he exclaimed, “Goony bird! The table! ”
Immediately, the Goony bird flew off its perch and with single-minded fury attacked the table and smashed it into a hundred little pieces with its powerful forearms and claws! To demonstrate some more, the shopkeeper said, more...
Udurawana rushed back angrily to the grocery shop from where he had purchased a packet of butter a few minutes ago.
"Where is my free gift?" he shouted at the shopkeeper. "But
Sir, there is no free gift on the purchase of butter." The
shopkeeper answered politely.
"Don't fool me," replied udurawana, "it is clearly written
on the packet of the butter' Cholesterol free' but you gave me only butter".
After many years of marriage, a husband has turned into a couch potato, became completely inattentive to his wife and sat guzzling beer and watching TV all day. The wife was dismayed because no matter what she did to attract the husband`s attention, he`d just shrug her off with some bored comment.
This went on for many months and the wife was going crazy with boredom. Then one day at a pet store, the wife saw this big, ugly, snorting bird with a hairy chest, powerful hairy forearms, beady eyes and dribble running down the side of its mouth.
The shopkeeper, observing her fascination with the bird, told her it was a special imported "Goony bird" and it had a very peculiar trait. To demonstrate, he exclaimed, "Goony bird! The table!"
Immediately, the Goony bird flew off its perch and with single-minded fury attacked the table and smashed it into a hundred little pieces with its powerful forearms and claws! To demonstrate some more, the more...