Slogans Jokes

In light of the recent arrest of 58 American Airlines employees for drug and weapons smuggling, here is a top ten list of new American Airlines slogans.
10) Fly Higher.
9) We're the Official Airline of the Cali Cartel.
8) We now serve one more type of coke.
7) Try our new coffee flavor: Heroin Hazelnut.
6) Our overhead bins can hold most firearms.
5) Ship 110 pounds of cocaine, pay for only 100.
4) If you have to wait on line, we'll give you a line.
3) Use your frequent flyer miles to post bail.
2) Meet our new spokesman, George W. Bush.
1) All our flights are smoking flights!

These are fabricated corporate slogans that would never have made if far if they entered the real world.
Microsoft: "How much are you going to pay today?"
MTV: "Loud and easy to spell."
Saks 5th Avenue: "You Could Shop Here if You're Poor, But That Would be Stupid!"
Iguana: "The other green meat."
Nike: "Just buy the shoes, you flabby spineless lump!"
Daisy Air Rifles: "Keeping kids off your lawn for over forty years."
Canon Photocopiers: "Quit calling them Xeroxes!"
Apple MacIntosh: "Hey, we thought of it first!"
Radio Shack: "You've got questions, we've got geek losers!"
Professional Bowling on NBC: "Oh, why don't you just go ahead and kill yourself instead?"

Top 50+ Geek T-Shirt slogans
1. Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.
2. COFFEE.EXE Missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key.
3. Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.
4. 2 + 2 = 5 for extrememly large values of
2.
5. Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.
6. Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
7. My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
8. C:DOS C:DOSRUN RUNDOSRUN
9. C:WINDOWS C:WINDOWSGO C:PCCRAWL
10. <
The information went data way---
11. Best file compression around: "DEL . " = 100% compression
12. The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.
13. BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding
14. The name is Baud... James Baud.
15. BUFFERS FILES_ 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!
16. Access denied

Top 50+ Geek T-Shirt slogans
1. Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.
2. COFFEE.EXE Missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key.
3. Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.
4. 2 + 2 = 5 for extrememly large values of
2.
5. Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.
6. Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
7. My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
8. C:DOS C:DOSRUN RUNDOSRUN
9. C:WINDOWS C:WINDOWSGO C:PCCRAWL
10. Bad Command or file name! Go stand in the corner.
18. Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay...
19. Why doesn't DOS ever say "EXCELLENT command or filename!"
20. As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
21. Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)
22. Backups? We don' NEED no steenking backups.
23. E Pluribus Modem
24. >... File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
25. Ethernet (n): something used to catch the more...

Actual Anti-War Slogans for the War on Iraq
These colors don't run the world.
One nation under surveillance.
It's the oil, stupid.
War is expensive, Peace is priceless.
Read between the Pipelines
No More BuSh.
Smart weapons, Dumb president.
The only thing we have to fear is Bush himself.
How many Lives per Gallon?
Patriots are idiots! Matriarchy Now!
Peace Takes Brains
Anything war can do, peace can do better.
Negotiation Not Annihilation.
Another patriot for peace.
How did our oil get under their sand?
Go Solar, not Ballistic.
Who Would Jesus Bomb?
Start Drafting SUV Drivers Now.
Don't blame me, I voted with the majority.
Buck Fush!
Resistance is Fertile.
(Pictures of sheep carrying flags) Stop Mad Sheep Disease Now.
(UFW sign) Pick Fruit, not Fights.
(On a five year old) More Candy Less War.
Say can you see my democracy?
(With pictures of Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld) Asses of more...