Sobbing Jokes / Recent Jokes

A wife woke of the middle of the night to find her husband missing from bed. She got out of bed and checked around the house. She heard sobbing from the basement. After turning on the light and descending the stairs, she found his husband curled up into a little ball, sobbing.
"Honey, what's wrong?" she asked, worried about what could hurt him so much. "Remember, 20 years ago, I got you pregnant? And your father threatened me to marry you or to go to jail?"
"Yes, of course," she replied. "Well, I would have been released tonight."

A man goes to visit the grave of his mother, puts a beautiful bouquet at the headstone and gets up, to leave when he notices another man crying his heart out, lying on one of the graves in such a way, that he breaks the other man's heart.

The sobbing goes on and on and he hears the other say:
- Oh why? Why did you have to die!? Why did you go?
And then he breaks down sobbing again, hitting his head over the headstone, still crying:
-Oh why did you die!? Why did you go so soon?

Intringued, the other guy goes to him and says:
I'm so sorry for your loss, is there anything I can do for you?
Who is the person you are crying over so desperately, he asks, in compassion?

That's my wife's third husband, comes the reply, between sobs.
I'm number four.....

One day a young man about the age of 25 was walking along the sidewalk in the park. Then all of a sudden he looks up form hearing the sound of an old man sobbing.

"What's wrong?" said the young man.

"Well it's nothing really." said the old man.

"It has to be something. Tell me about it" said the you man.

Well, everyday after I wake up in the morning, me and my wife have wild sex. Then I leave for work" the old man said.

"That's not bad" the young man said.

"Well, when I get home from work, my wife has already finished making lunch for me and her. Then after lunch we have more wild sex." the old man said.

"That's not bad at all. There's no reason why you should be sobbing." said the young man.

"When we finish making love, I go back to work at my second job. Then i come home and by that time, my wife is finished making supper. Then more...

A monk joins a abbey ready to dedicate his life to copying ancient books by hand. After the first day though, he reports to the head priest. He's concerned that all the monks have been copying from copies made from still more copies. "If someone makes a mistake," he points out. "It would be impossible to detect. Even worse the error would continue to be made."A bit startled, the priest decides that he better check their latest effort against the original which is kept in a vault beneath the abbey. A place only he has access to.Well two days, then three days pass without the priest resurfacing. Finally the new monk decides to see if the old guy is alright. When he gets down there though, he discovers the priest hunched over both a newly copied book and the ancient original text. He is sobbing and by the look of things has been sobbing for a long time."Father?" the monk whispers.
"oh lord jesus," the priest wails. "The word is more...

A girl sat sobbing in the police station. "I was raped by an Italian." She wailed." How do you know it was an Italian? The detective asked." I had to help him," the girl replied.

A wife woke up in the middle of the night to find her husband missing from bed. She got out of bed and checked around the house. She heard sobbing from the basement.
After turning on the light and descending the stairs, she found her husband curled up into a little ball, sobbing.
"Honey, what's wrong?" she asked.
"Remember, 20 years ago, I got you pregnant?"
"And your father threatened me to marry you or to go to jail?"
"Yes, of course," she replied.
"Well, I would have been released tonight."

A wife woke of the middle of the night to find her husband missing from bed. She got out of bed and checked around the house. She heard sobbing from the basement. After turning on the light and descending the stairs, she found he husband curled up into a little ball, sobbing. “Honey, what’s wrong? ” she asked, worried about what could hurt him so much. “Remember, 20 years ago, I got in love with you? And your father threatened me with the jail? ” “Yes, of course, ” she replied. “Well, I would have been released tonight. ”