Sparrow Jokes / Recent Jokes

"Can you help me? asked Alice.
"No," said Negative.
"I'm looking for a white consultant." Alice pointed in the direction she had been walking. "Did he go this way?" she asked.
"No," said Negative.
She pointed the other way.
"Yes," said Positive.
Soon Alice came upon a large brown table. The Consultant was there, as was an apparently Mad Hacker, and several creatures that Alice did not recognize. In one corner sat a Dormouse fast asleep. Over the table was a large sign that read "UNIX Conference."
Everyone except the Dormouse was holding a paper cup, from which they were sampling what appeared to be custard. "Wrong flavor," they all declared as they passed the cup the cup to the creature on their right and graciously took the one being offered on their left. Alice watched them repeat this ritual three or four times before she approached and sat down.
Immediately, a large more...

there are three men. 1 finds out that there is a cliff that when you jump off you turn into the thing you shout. that man tells the others about it. they go to the cliff and the first one jumps off and shouts Sparrow; he turns into a sparrow the second man jumps off and says Hawk he turns into a hawk. the third man jogs and trips over a rock as he is about to jump off it and says, "Oh, Crap!!!" and he turns into poop.

The Bird Question A blonde named Pam is appearing on “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire” with Regis Philbin. Regis: “Pam, you’re up to $500, 000 with one lifeline left: phone a friend.
If you get it right, the next question is worth one million dollars. If you get it wrong, you drop back to $32, 000. Are you ready? ” Pam: “Yes. ”
Regis: “Which of the following birds does not build its own nest?
Is it A) robin, B) sparrow, C) cuckoo, or D) thrush. ”
Pam: “I’d like to phone a friend. I’d like to call Carol. ”
Carol (also a blonde) answers the phone: “Hello? ”
Regis: “Hello Carol, it’s Regis Philbin from Who Wants to be a Millionaire. I have your friend Pam here who needs your help to answer the one million dollar question. The next voice you hear will be Pam’s…”
Pam: “Carol, which of the following birds does not build it’s own nest?
Is it A) robin, B) sparrow, C) cuckoo, or D) thrush. ” Carol: “Oh geez, more...

A blond named Pam is appearing on "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" with Regis Philbin
Regis: "Pam, you're up to $500,000 with one lifeline left: phone a friend. If you get it right, the next question is worth one million dollars. If you get it wrong, you drop back to $32,000. Are you ready?"
Pam: "Yes."
Regis: "Which of the following birds does not build its own nest? Is it A) robin, B) sparrow, C) cuckoo, or D) thrush."
Pam: "I'd like to phone a friend. I'd like to call Carol."
Carol (also a blond) answers the phone: "Hello?"
Regis: "Hello Carol, it's Regis Philbin from Who Wants to be a Millionaire. I have your friend Pam here who needs your help to answer the one million dollar question. The next voice you hear will be Pam's..."
Pam: "Carol, which of the following birds does not build it's own nest? Is it A) robin, B) sparrow, C) cuckoo, or D) thrush."
Carol: "Oh more...

There was once a non-conforming sparrow who decided to not fly south for the winter. However, the weather soon turned so cold that he changed his mind and reluctantly decided to fly south after all.
In a short time, ice began to form on his wings and he fell to Earth, landing in a barnyard, nearly frozen solid. A cow passed where he had fallen and crapped on the little sparrow. The little sparrow thought it was the end, but the manure warmed him and defrosted his wings.
Warm, happy, and able to breathe, the little sparrow began to sing.
Just then, a large cat came by, heard the chirping and investigated the sound. Clearing away the manure, the cat found the little chirping sparrow and promptly ate him!
The moral of the story...
Everyone who craps on you is not necessarily your enemy.
Everyone who gets you out of crap is not necessarily your friend.
And, if you're warm and happy in a pile of crap, you may just want to keep your mouth shut.

An elephant was having a horrible time in the jungle because a horseflykept biting near her tail and there was nothing she could do about it.It was far out of reach.A sparrow saw this and killed the horsefly with its beak."Oh, thank you!" said the elephant."My, pleasure ma'am." said the sparrow."Listen, Mr. Sparrow, if there's anything I can ever do for you, don'thesitate to ask."The sparrow said, "Well, all my life I wondered how it would feel to fuckan elephant.""Be my guest!", said the elephant.So the sparrow flew behind the elephant and started fucking. In the treesabove, a monkey in the tree saw this and became very excited. He started to masturbate, shaking a coconut loose and it fell from the tree, hitting the elephant on the head."OUCH!", said the elephant.Then sparrow looked over from behind and said, "Am I hurting you, dear?"

Santa is appearing on "Kaun Banega Crorepati (KBC)" with Amitabh Bachchan.
Amitabh: "Santa, you're up to Rs Fifty lakhs, with one lifeline left: phone a friend. If you get it right, the next question is worth a crore rupees If you get it wrong, you drop back to Rs 3,20,000. Are you ready?"
Santa: "Yes."
Amitabh: "Which of the following birds does not build it's own nest? Is it
A) robin, B) sparrow, C) cuckoo, or D) thrush."
Santa: "I'd like to phone a friend. I'd like to call Banta."
Banta answers the phone: "Hello?"
Amitabh: "Hello Banta ji, it's Amitabh Bachchan from KBC. I have your friend Santa here who needs your help to answer the final question. The next voice you hear will be Santa's..."
Santa: "Banta, which of the following birds does not build it's own nest?
Is it A) robin, B) sparrow, C) cuckoo, or D) thrush."
Banta: "Oh geez, Santa. That's simple. more...