Study Jokes / Recent Jokes

Several years ago the United States funded a study to determine why the head on a man's penis is larger than the shaft.The study took 2 years and cost over $180,000.00. The results of the study concluded that the reason the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft was to provide the man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published, Germany decided to conduct their own study on the same subject. They were convinced that the results of the U.S. study were incorrect. After three years of research and cost in excess of $250,000.00, they concluded that the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the women with more pleasure during sex.When the results of the German study were released, Poland decided to conduct their own study. The Poles didn't really trust the U.S. or German studies. So after nearly three weeks of intensive research and at a cost of right around $75.00, the Polish study reached a conclusion. The Polish study came to the final more...

Via New York Times
According to a new study, US 4th and 8th grade students have made significant improvements in math as compared to recent years. The study then goes on to say that we're still not doing as well as the Asians. But I would like to point out that we're more fun than the Asians, so who would you rather hang out with? Oh... wait... they had the Olympics this year.... OK... except for this year.. who would you rather hang out with?
I used to be really good at math, but now that I'm not in school I suck. The other day someone asked me what 16 + 7 was, and I said "hmm, it's at least 20"

After a two year study on America's recreational preferences, the following results were found:

1. The sport of choice for unemployed or incarcerated people is basketball.

2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is bowling.

3. The sport of choice for blue-collar line workers is football.

4. The sport of choice for supervisors is baseball.

5. The sport of choice for middle management is tennis.

6. The sport of choice for corporate officers is golf.

The conclusion of the study: The higher you rise in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.

University scientists have released the results of a recent analysis that reveals the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. It turns out that the "hops" in beer contain certain phyto-estrogens, and scientists believe that be drinking enough beer, men may turn into women. In the study, 100 male volunteers were asked to drink 8 pints of beer in one hour. The results were observed and recorded. At the end of one hour, every single subject had developed female characteristics and the test was terminated. The data is provided below:
After one hour, 100% of the test subjects:
1. gained weight.
2. talked excessively without making sense.
3. became overly emotional.
4. couldn't drive.
5. failed to think rationally.
6. argued over nothing.
7. had to sit down while urinating.
8. refused to apologize when obviously wrong.
After these eight symptoms, no further testing was necessary.

In 1993, the American Government funded a study to see why the head of a man's penis was larger than the shaft. After one year and $180, 000. 00, they concluded that the reason the head was larger than the shaft was to give the man more pleasure during sex. After the US published the study, France decided to do their own study. After $250, 000. 00, and 3 years of research, they concluded that the reason was to give the woman more pleasure during sex. Poland, unsatisfied with these findings, conducted their own study. After 2 weeks and a cost of around $75. 46, they concluded that it was to keep a man's hand from flying off and hitting him in the forehead.

A new study by a marketing intelligence firm revealed that most Twitter posts are nonsense and pointless. The results of the study were posted on Twitter.

A husband was trying to prove to his wife that women talk more than men. He showed her a study which indicated that men use about 10, 000 words per day, where as women use 20, 000 words per day.
His wife thought about this for a while. She then told her husband that women use twice as many words as men because they have to repeat everything they say.
Her husband looked stunned. He said "What?"