Study Jokes / Recent Jokes
Anally - occuring yearly
Artery - study of paintings
Bacteria - back door of cafeteria
Barium - what doctors do when treatment fails
Bowel - letter like A, E, I, O, U
Caesarian Section - district in Rome
Cat Scan - searching for kitty
Cauterize - make eye contact with her
Colic - sheep dog
Coma - a punctuation mark
Congenital - friendly
D&C - where Washington is
Diarrhea - a journal of daily events
Dilate - to live long
Enema - not a friend
Fester - quicker
Fibula - a small lie
Genital - non-Jewish
G. I. Series - soldires' ball game
Grippe - suitcase
Hangnail - coathook
Impotent - distinguished, well known
Intense Pain - torture in a teepee
Labour Pain - got hurt at work
Medical Staff - doctor's cane
Morbid - higher offer
Nitrate - cheaper than day rate
Node - was aware of
Outpatient - person who had fainted
Pap Smear - fatherhood more...
His
Pull up to ATM
Insert card
Enter PIN and account
Take cash, card and receipt
Drive away
Hers
Pull up to ATM
Back up and pull forward to get closer
Shut off engine
Put keys in purse
Get out of car because you're too far from machine
Hunt for card in purse
Insert card
Hunt in purse for grocery receipt with PIN written on it
Enter PIN
Study instructions
Hit "cancel"
Re-enter correct PIN
Check balance
Look for envelope
Look in purse for pen
Make out deposit slip
Endorse checks
Make deposit
Study instructions
Make cash withdrawal
Get in car
Check makeup
Look for keys
Start car
Check makeup
Start pulling away
Stop
Back up to machine
Get out of car
Take card and receipt
Get back in car
Put card in wallet
Put receipt in checkbook
Enter deposits and withdrawals in checkbook
Clear area in purse for wallet and more...
The longest word you can spell without repeating a letter: uncopyrightable.
The longest word with just one vowel: strengths
The only English word with a triple letter: goddessship
The word with the longest definition in most dictionaries: set
The shortest -ology (study of) word: oology (the study of eggs.)
Of is the only word in which an "f" is pronounced like a "v".
Well, if there's any truth to this study at all, then I should live to be 180 minimum! :)
From the New England Journal of Medicine:
Great news for girl watchers: Ogling over women's breasts is good for a man's health and can add years to his life, medical experts have discovered.
According to the New England Journal of Medicine, "Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a well-endowed female is roughly equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics work-out" declared gerontologist Dr. Karen Weatherby.
Dr. Weatherby and fellow researchers at three hospitals in Frankfurt, Germany, reached the startling conclusion after comparing the health of 200 male outpatients - half of whom were instructed to look at busty females daily, the other half told to refrain from doing so.
The study revealed that after five years, the chest-watchers had lower blood pressure, slower resting pulse rates and fewer instances of coronary artery disease. "Sexual excitement gets the more...
When your parents inquire about your grades and you sing the cookie monster song (C is for cookie, that's good enough for me...).
You have spent more time figuring out that you only need a 54% on the final to pass than you have actually spent studying.
When you are swamped with homework and spend your time making up a list like this.
When you start showering after class rather than before.
The test papers are no longer worthy of the fridge door.
When the campus drunk tells you you should study more.
When your favorite paperweight says "Bud Light."
Visions of the upcoming weekend help you to make it through Monday.
When your absence exceeds your attendance.
When your study schedule is based on the rationale that you "might" actually die before the test!
In 1993, the American Government funded a study to see why the head of a man's penis was larger than the shaft. After one year and $180, 000. 00 they concluded that the reason the head was larger than the shaft was to give the man more pleasure during sex.
After the US published the study, the French decided to do their own study. After $250, 000. 00, and 3 years of research, they concluded that the reason was to give the woman more pleasure during sex.
Australian scientists, unsatisfied with these findings, conducted their own study. After 2 weeks and a cost of $74. 95, they concluded that it was to keep a man's hand from flying off and hitting him in the forehead.
Well, if there's any truth to this study at all, then I should live to be 180 minimum! :)From the New England Journal of Medicine:Great news for girl watchers: Ogling over women's breasts is good for a man's health and can add years to his life, medical experts have discovered.According to the New England Journal of Medicine, "Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a well-endowed female is roughly equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics work-out" declared gerontologist Dr. Karen Weatherby.Dr. Weatherby and fellow researchers at three hospitals in Frankfurt, Germany, reached the startling conclusion after comparing the health of 200 male outpatients - half of whom were instructed to look at busty females daily, the other half told to refrain from doing so.The study revealed that after five years, the chest-watchers had lower blood pressure, slower resting pulse rates and fewer instances of coronary artery disease. "Sexual excitement gets the heart pumping and improves more...