Sultan Jokes / Recent Jokes
Erap, Joe De V and Fred Lim are soliciting campaign funds from the Sultan of Brunei. The Sultan has a very intelligent horse, who understands English but is lame. Sultan says he will donate a million dollars to the candidate who can make the horse laugh, cry and run. Joe says, "Me first." (as he is wont to do). He puts his face in front of the horse, and starts wiggling his huge ears. The horse enjoys the breeze, but does not laugh. Joe takes out money and waives it in front of the horse while making sad, crying sounds. The horse ignores the money, and refuses to cry. Joe then slaps the horse's behind, and starts shouting "Heyaah". The horse ignores him and refuses to run. (The fact that the horse speaks English was totally lost on Joe, who is not very bright). Lim comes up next. He looks at the horse and says, "Kapag' di ka tumawa, papatayin kita". Horse no laugh. He walks over to the other side and says, "Kapag' di ka umiyak, papa-salvage more...
The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. January 12, 1993San Francisco police arrested Russell C. Sultan in July and charged him with attempting to extort $23, 000 from his mother and girlfriend by claiming to have been kidnapped for ransom. After tracing telephone calls, police, guns drawn, burst into a motel room to find Sultan casually eating fried chicken and watching a 49ers football game. Sultan said the kidnappers had merely left him alone for a while, and exclaimed to the officers, "What took you so long?"
The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.January 12, 1993San Francisco police arrested Russell C. Sultan in July and charged him with attempting to extort $23,000 from his mother and girlfriend by claiming to have been kidnapped for ransom.After tracing telephone calls, police, guns drawn, burst into a motel room to find Sultan casually eating fried chicken and watching a 49ers football game.Sultan said the kidnappers had merely left him alone for a while, and exclaimed to the officers, "What took you so long?"
Q: What`s the difference between England and a tea bag?
A: The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
Q. Why has Kevin keegan banned his players from owning dogs?
A. Because they can`t hang onto a lead.
The Sultan of Brunei was getting a bit cheesed off as he had 6 children, all girls, and therefore had no son and heir. Imagine his joy then, when one of his wives presented him with his only son and heir.
Just before his son`s sixth birthday, the Sultan took him to one side and said, "Son, I am very proud of you. Anything you want, I shall get for you". His son replied, "Daddy, I would like an aeroplane".
Not wanting to do anything by halves, his father bought him British Airways. Just before his son`s seventh birthday, the Sultan took him to one side.
"Son, you are my pride and joy. Anything you want, I shall get for you." His son replied, "Daddy, I would like a boat".
Not wanting to do anything by halves, his more...