Susie Jokes / Recent Jokes

Little Johnny and Susie are only ten years old, but they're sure they're in love and decided they wanted to get married.
Little Johnny bravely approached Susie's father and said, "Mr. Jones, me and Susie love each other and I would like to ask you for her hand in marriage."
Thinking this was the cutest thing he'd ever heard, Mr. Jones replied, "Well, Johnny, you are only ten years old. Where will the two of you live?"
Without hesitation, Johnny replied, "In Susie's room, of course. It's much larger than mine and we can both fit all our stuff in there very nicely."
"Ok then, Johnny," a grinning Mr. Jones said, "how will the two of you live? You aren't old enough to get a job yet and you'll need to support Susie."
Again, Johnny quickly replied, "We have our allowances. Susie makes five dollars a week and I make ten. That's about sixty dollars a month, so that should do us just fine."
By this time, Mr. more...

Her mother decided that 10-year-old Susie should get something practical for her birthday. "Suppose we open a savings account for you?" she suggested. Susie was delighted.

"It's your account, darling," Susie's mother said as they entered at the bank, "So you fill out the application."

Susie was doing fine until she came to the space for "Name of your former bank".

With just a slight hesitation, she put down "Piggy".

One day, Little Susie got her monthly bleeding for the first time in her life. Not quite certain what was happening, and somewhat frightened, she decided to tell Little Johnny. Little Susie dropped her panties and showed Little Johnny what was happening.

Little Johnny's eyes opened wide in amazement. "You know," he said, "I'm not a doctor, but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"

One day a cop was walking along in the ghetto. He came upon a guy sitting on the curb and thinking. He went up to the guy.
"What are you doing," the cop asks."
I'm just thinking about starting a bar right over there, but I can't think of a name for the place," the man replied."
If you can come up with a name for me I'll give you a free drink,"the guy said. The cop likes this idea, so the first thing he thinks of he tells the man."
How about Susie," the cop suggests.
"Susie, I like it. Come back tomorrow for you're drink," said the man.
The cop returns to the ghetto the next day. The guy is sitting on the curb again."
What about Susie?"
the cop asked."
The man answered," I thought about it and I decided I didn't like it.I'll give you two drinks if you come up with a better name" The cop thought for a moment and said" Susie's Legs" The man agreed and told the cop to more...

Little Susie was Mommy's helper. She helped set the table when company was due for dinner. Soon, everything was on, Mr. Smythe the guest came in, and everyone sat down. Then Mother noticed something was missing...." Susie, dear," she said, "You didn't put a knife and fork at Mr. Smythe's place." "But, Mommy, I thought he wouldn't need them," explained Susie. "Daddy says he always eats like a horse!"

Young Johnny and Susie were playing doctor, on the back porch when Susie's mom popped in on them. "You're gonna get a good lickin when daddy gets home" she said Susie replied, "Johnny's been doing that all afternoon."

In school one day the teacher decided that in science class she would teach about materials; So she stood in the front of the class and said, "Children, if you could have one raw material in the world what would it be?"

Little Stevie raised his hand and said "I would want gold, because gold is worth a lot of money and I could buy a Porsche."

The teacher nodded and called on little Susie.

Little Susie said, "I would want platinum because platinum is worth more than gold and I could buy a Corvette"

The teacher smiled and then called on Little Johnny. Little Johnny stood up and said, "I would want silicon."

The teacher said, "Why Johnny?"

He responded by saying, "Because my mom has two bags of it and you should see all the sports cars outside our house!!"