Tarzan Jokes / Recent Jokes

Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Tarzan.
Tarzan who?
Tarzan stripes forever.

Q. If Tarzan and Jane were Italian, what would Cheetah be? A. The least hairy of the three.

One day Jane met Tarzan in the jungle. She was very attracted to him and during her questions about his life she asked him how he managed for sex.
"What's that?" he asked.
She explained to him what sex was and he said, "Oh, I use a hole in the trunk of a tree."
Horrified, she said, "Tarzan you have it all wrong, but I will show you how to do it properly."
She took off her clothes, laid down on the ground and spread her legs wide. "Here," she said, "you must put it in here."
Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her an almighty kick in the crotch. Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp, "What the hell did you do that for?"
"Just checking for bees," said Tarzan.

Tarzan swings through the air
Tarzan loses his underwear
Tarzan says "Me no care,
Jane make me another pair."
Boy swings through the air
Boy loses his underwear
Boy says "Me no care,
Jane make me another pair."
Cheetah swings through the air
Cheetah loses his underwear
Cheetah says "Me no care,
Jane make me another pair."
Jane swings through the air
Jane loses her underwear
Jane says "Me no care,
Tarzan like me better bare!"

(1)You are next. .
When I was younger I hated going to weddings.
It seemed that all of my aunts and the grandmotherly types used to come up to me, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me,"You are next".
They stopped that shit after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals. [:))]
(2) Divorce Joke...
"Mr. Smith, I have reviewed this case very carefully",
The divorce court judge said, "and I've decided to give your wife $275 a week."
"That's very nice, your honour", the husband said.
"And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks, myself".

(3) Tarzan &dead Cheetah
What did Tarzan think when he saw a dead Cheetah?
Wow! New Underwear.

(4) Women in Heven
What do u call a woman in heaven?
An Angel.
A crowd of woman in heaven?
A host of Angels.
And all woman in heaven?
PEACE ON EARTH!

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Tarzan!
Tarzan who?
Tarzan stripes forever!

Why am I stronger than Tarzan?
Because I can beat on my chest without screaming.