Terrorist Jokes / Recent Jokes
"Terrorist training camps looked a lot nicer in the brochure"
"I didn't join the Taliban, I was interning for the Taliban"
"I lost a Super Bowl bet"
"Dazzled by the Taliban commercials that aired during one of Kathie Lee's Ramadan specials"
"What kid doesn't grow up dreaming of being the next Mullah Omar?"
"Al Qaeda? Oh man, I thought I was fighting for Ralph Nader"
"Since when is fighting against your country with an evil terrorist regime considered treason?"
"Got tired of wearing clean clothes and not getting shot at"
"Like you've never joined an international terrorist ring!"
"Oh, I thought this was a paintball game"
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For long, India's colonial rulers divided the country's population by the numbers. And as current-day politicians continue with that unholy task, we present a shortcut to make their work easier. Here's distinguishing India's different cultures by the numbers: MALAYALEES One Malayalee is a narial-pani shop.
Two Malayalees is a boat race.
Three Malayalees is a Gulf job racket.
Four Malayalees is an oilslick. TAMILIANS
One Tamilian is a fugitive sandalwood smuggler.
Two Tamilians is a suicide-bomb squad.
Three Tamilians is a classical music school.
Four Tamilians is a Jayalalitha fan club. ANDHRAITES
One Andhraite is a cycle-rickshaw driver.
Two Andhraites is a spice shop.
Three Andhraites is a Naxalite outfit.
Four Andhraites is the Telugu film industry. BENGALIS
One Bengali is a rosagulla shop.
Two Bengalis is a black-and-white movie.
Three Bengalis is a Mohun Bagan support group.
Four Bengalis is a Marxist more...
After days in the wilderness Santa and Banta stumble into a bar in the wild north in J&K and ask for two beers. Unfortunately they've got no money and the barman won't give them credit. Just then a Kashmiri walks in with a terrorist's head under his arm.
The barman shakes his hand and says, "I f**king hate terrorosts. Last week the bastards burnt my barn to the ground, raped my wife and killed my children. If any man brings me the head of a terrorist, I will give him Rs 10,000".
Santa and Banta look at each other and then go off to find a terrorist. Later that day, they see one, and Banta throws a stone which hits the terrorist on the head. The terrorist falls off his bike but lands 100ft down a ravine.
Santa and Banta dash down into the ravine, where Santa starts sawing the terrorist's head off.
Suddenly Banta says, 'Santa look at this.'
Santa says, "Not now I'm busy."
Banta says, "No, look at this."
Santa says, "Shut up, more...
What is the difference between a terrorist and a PMS woman? You can negotiate with the terrorist.
A B-52 bomber was "mistakenly" loaded with five nuclear warheads and flown to Barksdale Air Force Base in Louisiana.
The "missing" nukes resulted in an Air Force-wide investigation, according to several officers who asked not to be identified because they were not authorized to discuss the incident.
They added: "we think they represent Bush's'final solution' for Katrina reconstruction, but we can't be certain."